‘Halloween Without Trick-or-Treating can be a Hallo-win’

WTAF is this abomination of a CNN opinion piece?

Opinion: Halloween without trick-or-treating can be a Hallo-win
Opinion: Halloween without trick-or-treating can be a Hallo-win

The article goes on for 1,100 words and reads like someone decided to turn one of her diary entries into a light-hearted opinion piece that was rejected by Family Circle for being too cringe.

Ultimately, Ms. Pretzel twists herself into knots to reconcile herself with the land that Halloween forgot,

This year, my family has decided to stay home on Halloween, but we’ve made up for it by going to a trunk-or-treat event, a Halloween carnival and a pumpkin patch earlier in the month. I have to admit: they were all a blast. Between bounce houses and crafts and cookie decorating, dare I say, it may have been more fun than going door-to-door. I started to think about the benefits of being in my non-trick-or-treating neighborhood: I wouldn’t need to fish candy wrappers out of my bushes, wouldn’t need to coax my daughter out of a candy coma on November 1st, plus, we’d been inspired to find fun, new events.

Not being in a trick-or-treating area, I decided, is something of a…well, treat.

Congratulations on your hollow win, I guess?

Hopefully, CNN can move on from its coverage of valium-world problems.

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