Will It Be Impossible to Determine Who Won Florida?

Writing for National Review Online, Jonah Goldberg points out that it is very likely that after doing a recount of votes in Florida, the number of votes separating Al Gore and George Bush is likely to be within the margin of error for the counting process.

This means that, theoretically, Florida could do a dozen recounts and get a dozen different results each time. If Gore turns out to win the recount (and it doesn’t look like he will) by a few hundred votes, for example, Bush could sue to get yet another recount only to have that recount put him up by a few hundred votes and the process could go back and forth ad infinitum.

On the other hand, while I am indifferent to whether Gore or Bush wins, the hints that Gore might actively campaign for electors to vote for him rather than Bush is obnoxious. It would be like a football team that loses a game 14 to 9 begging the referee to change the rules so that the team with the most field goals rather than touchdowns wins. It may or may not make sense for touchdowns to count for more points than field goals, or for the electoral system to allow the popular vote loser to take the electoral college, but those are the rules that both teams were operating under when the contest began.

Both the winning football team and Bush would have used different strategies if field goals and popular votes counted more than touchdowns and the Electoral College respectively. Punishing either for playing by the rules of the game does not make any sense.

Caleb Carr: The Internet’s Just E-Commerce and Porn

Opened up the new issue of Wired last night to find a mini-interview with best selling novelist Caleb Carr. His new dystopian novel, Killing Time, is set in 2024 and blames an unregulated Internet for the collapse of civilization. Whatever, but this quote really made me wonder if he even uses Internet,

Wired: Isn’t TV as easy to fake as the Net?

Carr: At least TV tries to check stuff out. Look, the Internet is basically a tool for buying things and for pornography. When it becomes more than that, it will become extremely dangerous.

Maybe that’s all Carr uses the Internet for, but I think the rest of us have found other uses for it as well. (And television is notorious for not “check[ing] stuff out.”)

United Poultry Concerns Wants Rubber Chicken Recalled

The only thing dumber than OddzOn’s rubber chicken candy dispenser has to be United Poultry Concerns’ Franklin Wade who has been fighting a war against the stupid novelty item.

Okay, usually OddzOn produces some of the coolest toys in the world — their Vortex football rocks — but what is the point of a plucked rubber chicken with a Tootsie Roll lollipop sticking out of its throat? Sounds like something they would sell at a place like Spencer Gifts, but Rite Aid carried these things for a while before protests from animal rights activists led them to pull them off the shelves.

Still some convenience stores and other places are selling them and Wade put out a press release today calling for activists to “protest to the store manager if you see this item for sale.”

Which is certainly their right but what exactly was going on in Wade’s mind when he wrote in a UPC press release,

It [the rubber chicken] encourages children and others to regard animal suffering and death — the cruel treatment of chickens especially — as amusing. It has a strong pornographic implication along with cruelty to animals.

Now I do not know about Wade’s lifestyle, but I’ve seen plenty of rubber chickens and none of them exactly turned me on. I guess sex appeal is in the eye of the beholder.

Source:

Stop production, distribution, and sale of cruel and obscene chicken toy. Press release, United Poultry Concerns, November 9, 2000.