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<h1>RHYME?<br />AND REASON?</h1>
<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i002.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i004.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;UPON A BATTLEMENT.&#8221;</small><span class="spacer">&nbsp;</span>[<i>See</i> p. <a href="#Page_30">30</a>.</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

<h1>RHYME?<br />AND REASON?</h1>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h4>BY</h4>
<h3>LEWIS CARROLL</h3>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="center"><i>WITH SIXTY-FIVE ILLUSTRATIONS</i><br />BY<br />ARTHUR B. FROST<br /><br />
<i>AND NINE</i><br />BY<br />HENRY HOLIDAY</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="center">I have had nor rhyme nor reason</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="center"><i>PRICE SEVEN SHILLINGS</i><br />London<br />
MACMILLAN AND CO.<br />1883<br />[<i>All Rights Reserved</i>]</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="center">London:<br /><span class="smcap">R. Clay, Sons, and Taylor</span><br />BREAD STREET HILL, E.C.</p>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />

<p class="center"><big>Inscribed to a dear Child:<br />
in memory of golden summer hours<br />
and whispers of a summer sea.</big></p>
<hr style='width: 5%;' />

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Girt with a boyish garb for boyish task,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Eager she wields her spade: yet loves as well</span><br />
Rest on a friendly knee, intent to ask<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">The tale one loves to tell.</span><br />
<br />
Rude scoffer of the seething outer strife,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Unmeet to read her pure and simple spright,</span><br />
Deem, if thou wilt, such hours a waste of life,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Empty of all delight!</span><br />
<br />
Chat on, sweet Maid, and rescue from annoy<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Hearts that by wiser talk are unbeguiled;</span><br />
Ah, happy he who owns that tenderest joy,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">The heart-love of a child!</span><br />
<br />
Away, fond thoughts, and vex my soul no more!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Work claims my wakeful nights, my busy days</span><br />
Albeit bright memories of that sunlit shore<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Yet haunt my dreaming gaze!</span></td></tr></table>


<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="note">[Of the following poems, <span class="smcap">Echoes</span>, <span class="smcap">A Game of Fives</span>, the last three of the
<span class="smcap">Four Riddles</span>, and <span class="smcap">Fame&#8217;s Penny-Trumpet</span>, are here published for the first
time. The others have all appeared before, as have also the illustrations to <span class="smcap">The Hunting of the Snark</span>.]</p>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<h2>CONTENTS.</h2>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&nbsp;</td><td>&nbsp;</td><td align="right"><small>PAGE</small></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Phantasmagoria</span>, in Seven Cantos:&mdash;</td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">I.</span></td><td>The Trystyng</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_1">1</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">II.</span></td><td>Hys Fyve Rules</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_10">10</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">III.</span></td><td>Scarmoges</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_18">18</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">IV.</span></td><td>Hys Nouryture</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_26">26</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">V.</span></td><td>Byckerment</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_34">34</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">VI.</span></td><td>Dyscomfyture</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_44">44</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">VII.</span></td><td>Sad Souvenaunce</td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_53">53</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Echoes</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_58">58</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">A Sea Dirge</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_59">59</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Y<sup>e</sup> Carpette Knyghte</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_64">64</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Hiawatha&#8217;s Photographing</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_66">66</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Melancholetta</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_78">78</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">A Valentine</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_84">84</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">The Three Voices</span>:</td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span style="margin-left: 3em;">The First Voice</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_87">87</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span style="margin-left: 3em;">The Second Voice</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_98">98</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span style="margin-left: 3em;">The Third Voice</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_109">109</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">T&egrave;ma Con Variazi&oacute;ni</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_118">118</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">A Game of Fives</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_120">120</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Poeta fit, non nascitur</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_123">123</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">The Hunting of the Snark</span>, an Agony in Eight Fits:&mdash;</td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">I.</span></td><td><span class="smcap">The Landing</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_134">134</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">II.</span></td><td><span class="smcap">The Bellman&#8217;s Speech</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_142">142</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">III.</span></td><td><span class="smcap">The Baker&#8217;s Tale</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_148">148</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">IV.</span></td><td><span class="smcap">The Hunting</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_153">153</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">V.</span></td><td><span class="smcap">The Beaver&#8217;s Lesson</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_159">159</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">VI.</span></td><td><span class="smcap">The Barrister&#8217;s Dream</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_167">167</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">VII.</span></td><td><span class="smcap">The Banker&#8217;s Fate</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_173">173</a></td></tr>
<tr><td align="right"><span style="margin-left: 1em;">VIII.</span></td><td><span class="smcap">The Vanishing</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_177">177</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Size and Tears</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_181">181</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Atalanta in Camden Town</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_186">186</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">The Lang Coortin&#8217;</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_190">190</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Four Riddles</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_202">202</a></td></tr>
<tr><td colspan="2"><span class="smcap">Fame&#8217;s Penny-Trumpet</span></td><td align="right"><a href="#Page_211">211</a></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[Pg 1]</a></span></p>
<h2>PHANTASMAGORIA.</h2>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3>CANTO I.</h3>
<h4>The Trystyng.</h4>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>One winter night, at half-past nine,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Cold, tired, and cross, and muddy,</span><br />
I had come home, too late to dine,<br />
And supper, with cigars and wine,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Was waiting in the study.</span><br />
<br />
There was a strangeness in the room,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And Something white and wavy</span><br />
Was standing near me in the gloom&mdash;<br />
<i>I</i> took it for the carpet-broom<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Left by that careless slavey.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_2" id="Page_2">[Pg 2]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i014.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

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<tr><td>But presently the Thing began<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To shiver and to sneeze:</span><br />
On which I said &#8220;Come, come, my man!<br />
That&#8217;s a most inconsiderate plan.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Less noise there, if you please!&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[Pg 3]</a></span><br />
&#8220;I&#8217;ve caught a cold,&#8221; the Thing replies,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Out there upon the landing.&#8221;</span><br />
I turned to look in some surprise,<br />
And there, before my very eyes,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A little Ghost was standing!</span><br />
<br />
He trembled when he caught my eye,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And got behind a chair.</span><br />
&#8220;How came you here,&#8221; I said, &#8220;and why?<br />
I never saw a thing so shy.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Come out! Don&#8217;t shiver there!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
He said &#8220;I&#8217;d gladly tell you how,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And also tell you why;</span><br />
But&#8221; (here he gave a little bow)<br />
&#8220;You&#8217;re in so bad a temper now,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">You&#8217;d think it all a lie.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And as to being in a fright,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Allow me to remark</span><br />
That Ghosts have just as good a right,<br />
In every way, to fear the light,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">As Men to fear the dark.&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[Pg 4]</a></span><br />
&#8220;No plea,&#8221; said I, &#8220;can well excuse<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Such cowardice in you:</span><br />
For Ghosts can visit when they choose,<br />
Whereas we Humans ca&#8217;n&#8217;t refuse<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To grant the interview.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
He said &#8220;A flutter of alarm<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Is not unnatural, is it?</span><br />
I really feared you meant some harm:<br />
But, now I see that you are calm,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Let me explain my visit.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Houses are classed, I beg to state,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">According to the number</span><br />
Of Ghosts that they accommodate:<br />
(The Tenant merely counts as <i>weight</i>,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With Coals and other lumber).</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;This is a &#8216;one-ghost&#8217; house, and you<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">When you arrived last summer,</span><br />
May have remarked a Spectre who<br />
Was doing all that Ghosts can do<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To welcome the new-comer.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[Pg 5]</a></span><br />
&#8220;In Villas this is always done&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">However cheaply rented:</span><br />
For, though of course there&#8217;s less of fun<br />
When there is only room for one,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Ghosts have to be contented.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;That Spectre left you on the Third&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Since then you&#8217;ve not been haunted:</span><br />
For, as he never sent us word,<br />
&#8217;Twas quite by accident we heard<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That any one was wanted.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;A Spectre has first choice, by right,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">In filling up a vacancy;</span><br />
Then Phantom, Goblin, Elf, and Sprite&mdash;<br />
If all these fail them, they invite<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The nicest Ghoul that they can see.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The Spectres said the place was low,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And that you kept bad wine:</span><br />
So, as a Phantom had to go,<br />
And I was first, of course, you know,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I couldn&#8217;t well decline.&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[Pg 6]</a></span><br />
&#8220;No doubt,&#8221; said I, &#8220;they settled who<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Was fittest to be sent:</span><br />
Yet still to choose a brat like you,<br />
To haunt a man of forty-two,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Was no great compliment!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;I&#8217;m not so young, Sir,&#8221; he replied,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;As you might think. The fact is,</span><br />
In caverns by the water-side,<br />
And other places that I&#8217;ve tried,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I&#8217;ve had a lot of practice:</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;But I have never taken yet<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A strict domestic part,</span><br />
And in my flurry I forget<br />
The Five Good Rules of Etiquette<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">We have to know by heart.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
My sympathies were warming fast<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Towards the little fellow:</span><br />
He was so utterly aghast<br />
At having found a Man at last,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And looked so scared and yellow.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[Pg 7]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i019.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;IN CAVERNS BY THE WATER-SIDE&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[Pg 8]</a></span></p>

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<tr><td>&#8220;At least,&#8221; I said, &#8220;I&#8217;m glad to find<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A Ghost is not a <i>dumb</i> thing!</span><br />
But pray sit down: you&#8217;ll feel inclined<br />
(If, like myself, you have not dined)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To take a snack of something:</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Though, certainly, you don&#8217;t appear<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A thing to offer <i>food</i> to!</span><br />
And then I shall be glad to hear&mdash;<br />
If you will say them loud and clear&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The Rules that you allude to.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Thanks! You shall hear them by and by<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">This <i>is</i> a piece of luck!&#8221;</span><br />
&#8220;What may I offer you?&#8221; said I.<br />
&#8220;Well, since you <i>are</i> so kind, I&#8217;ll try<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A little bit of duck.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;<i>One</i> slice! And may I ask you for<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Another drop of gravy?&#8221;</span><br />
I sat and looked at him in awe,<br />
For certainly I never saw<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A thing so white and wavy.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[Pg 9]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i021.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>And still he seemed to grow more white,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">More vapoury, and wavier&mdash;</span><br />
Seen in the dim and flickering light,<br />
As he proceeded to recite<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">His &#8220;Maxims of Behaviour.&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[Pg 10]</a></span></p>
<h3>CANTO II.</h3>
<h4>Hys Fyve Rules.</h4>

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<tr><td>&#8220;My First&mdash;but don&#8217;t suppose,&#8221; he said,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;I&#8217;m setting you a riddle&mdash;</span><br />
Is&mdash;if your Victim be in bed,<br />
Don&#8217;t touch the curtains at his head,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">But take them in the middle,</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And wave them slowly in and out,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">While drawing them asunder;</span><br />
And in a minute&#8217;s time, no doubt,<br />
He&#8217;ll raise his head and look about<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With eyes of wrath and wonder.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And here you must on no pretence<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Make the first observation.</span><br />
Wait for the Victim to commence:<br />
No Ghost of any common sense<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Begins a conversation.</span></td></tr></table>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[Pg 11]</a></span></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" summary="table">
<tr><td valign="top" rowspan="2"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i023left.jpg" alt="" /></td><td valign="top"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i023right.jpg" alt="" /></td></tr>
<tr><td>&#8220;If he should say &#8216;<i>How came you here?</i>&#8217;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">(The way that <i>you</i> began, Sir,)</span><br />
In such a case your course is clear&mdash;<br />
&#8216;<i>On the bat&#8217;s back, my little dear!</i>&#8217;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Is the appropriate answer.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;If after this he says no more,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">You&#8217;d best perhaps curtail your</span><br />
Exertions&mdash;go and shake the door,<br />
And then, if he begins to snore,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">You&#8217;ll know the thing&#8217;s a failure.</span></td></tr></table>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[Pg 12]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;By day, if he should be alone&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">At home or on a walk&mdash;</span><br />
You merely give a hollow groan,<br />
To indicate the kind of tone<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">In which you mean to talk.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;But if you find him with his friends,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The thing is rather harder.</span><br />
In such a case success depends<br />
On picking up some candle-ends,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Or butter, in the larder.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;With this you make a kind of slide<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">(It answers best with suet),</span><br />
On which you must contrive to glide,<br />
And swing yourself from side to side&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">One soon learns how to do it.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The Second tells us what is right<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">In ceremonious calls:&mdash;</span><br />
&#8216;<i>First burn a blue or crimson light</i>&#8217;<br />
(A thing I quite forgot to-night),<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8216;<i>Then scratch the door or walls.</i>&#8217;&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[Pg 13]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i025.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;AND SWING YOURSELF FROM SIDE TO SIDE&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[Pg 14]</a></span></p>

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<tr><td>I said &#8220;You&#8217;ll visit <i>here</i> no more,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">If you attempt the Guy.</span><br />
I&#8217;ll have no bonfires on <i>my</i> floor&mdash;<br />
And, as for scratching at the door,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I&#8217;d like to see you try!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The Third was written to protect<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The interests of the Victim,</span><br />
And tells us, as I recollect,<br />
<i>To treat him with a grave respect,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>And not to contradict him</i>.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;That&#8217;s plain,&#8221; said I, &#8220;as Tare and Tret,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To any comprehension:</span><br />
I only wish <i>some</i> Ghosts I&#8217;ve met<br />
Would not so <i>constantly</i> forget<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The maxim that you mention!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Perhaps,&#8221; he said, &#8220;<i>you</i> first transgressed<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The laws of hospitality:</span><br />
All Ghosts instinctively detest<br />
The Man that fails to treat his guest<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With proper cordiality.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[Pg 15]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i027.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;If you address a Ghost as &#8216;Thing!&#8217;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Or strike him with a hatchet,</span><br />
He is permitted by the King<br />
To drop all <i>formal</i> parleying&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And then you&#8217;re <i>sure</i> to catch it!</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[Pg 16]</a></span><br />
&#8220;The Fourth prohibits trespassing<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Where other Ghosts are quartered:</span><br />
And those convicted of the thing<br />
(Unless when pardoned by the King)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Must instantly be slaughtered.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;That simply means &#8216;be cut up small&#8217;:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Ghosts soon unite anew:</span><br />
The process scarcely hurts at all&mdash;<br />
Not more than when <i>you&#8217;re</i> what you call<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8216;Cut up&#8217; by a Review.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The Fifth is one you may prefer<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That I should quote entire:&mdash;</span><br />
<i>The King must be addressed as &#8216;Sir.&#8217;</i><br />
<i>This, from a simple courtier,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>Is all the Laws require</i>:</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;<i>But, should you wish to do the thing</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>With out-and-out politeness,</i></span><br />
<i>Accost him as &#8216;My Goblin King!&#8217;</i><br />
<i>And always use, in answering,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>The phrase &#8216;Your Royal Whiteness!&#8217;</i></span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[Pg 17]</a></span><br />
&#8220;I&#8217;m getting rather hoarse, I fear,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">After so much reciting:</span><br />
So, if you don&#8217;t object, my dear,<br />
We&#8217;ll try a glass of bitter beer&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I think it looks inviting.&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i029.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[Pg 18]</a></span></p>
<h3>CANTO III.</h3>
<h4>Scarmoges.</h4>

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<tr><td>&#8220;And did you really walk,&#8221; said I,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;On such a wretched night?</span><br />
I always fancied Ghosts could fly&mdash;<br />
If not exactly in the sky,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Yet at a fairish height.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;It&#8217;s very well,&#8221; said he, &#8220;for Kings<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To soar above the earth:</span><br />
But Phantoms often find that wings&mdash;<br />
Like many other pleasant things&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Cost more than they are worth.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Spectres of course are rich, and so<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Can buy them from the Elves:</span><br />
But <i>we</i> prefer to keep below&mdash;<br />
They&#8217;re stupid company, you know.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">For any but themselves:</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[Pg 19]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i031.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

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<tr><td>&#8220;For, though they claim to be exempt<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">From pride, they treat a Phantom</span><br />
As something quite beneath contempt&mdash;<br />
Just as no Turkey ever dreamt<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Of noticing a Bantam.&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[Pg 20]</a></span><br />
&#8220;They seem too proud,&#8221; said I, &#8220;to go<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To houses such as mine.</span><br />
Pray, how did they contrive to know<br />
So quickly that &#8216;the place was low,&#8217;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And that I &#8216;kept bad wine&#8217;?&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Inspector Kobold came to you&mdash;&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The little Ghost began.</span><br />
Here I broke in&mdash;&#8220;Inspector who?<br />
Inspecting Ghosts is something new!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Explain yourself my man!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;His name is Kobold,&#8221; said my guest:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;One of the Spectre order:</span><br />
You&#8217;ll very often see him dressed<br />
In a yellow gown, a crimson vest,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And a night-cap with a border.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;He tried the Brocken business first,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">But caught a sort of chill;</span><br />
So came to England to be nursed,<br />
And here it took the form of <i>thirst</i>,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Which he complains of still.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[Pg 21]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i033.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;AND HERE IT TOOK THE FORM OF <i>THIRST</i>&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[Pg 22]</a></span></p>

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<tr><td>&#8220;Port-wine, he says, when rich and sound,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Warms his old bones like nectar:</span><br />
And as the inns, where it is found,<br />
Are his especial hunting-ground,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">We call him the <i>Inn-Spectre</i>.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
I bore it&mdash;bore it like a man&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">This agonizing witticism!</span><br />
And nothing could be sweeter than<br />
My temper, till the Ghost began<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Some most provoking criticism.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Cooks need not be indulged in waste;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Yet still you&#8217;d better teach them</span><br />
Dishes should have <i>some sort</i> of taste.<br />
Pray, why are all the cruets placed<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Where nobody can reach them?</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;That man of yours will never earn<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">His living as a waiter!</span><br />
Is that queer <i>thing</i> supposed to burn?<br />
(It&#8217;s far too dismal a concern<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To call a Moderator).</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[Pg 23]</a></span><br />
&#8220;The duck was tender, but the peas<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Were very much too old:</span><br />
And just remember, if you please,<br />
The <i>next</i> time you have toasted cheese,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Don&#8217;t let them send it cold.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;You&#8217;d find the bread improved, I think,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">By getting better flour:</span><br />
And have you anything to drink<br />
That looks a <i>little</i> less like ink,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And isn&#8217;t <i>quite</i> so sour?&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Then, peering round with curious eyes,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He muttered &#8220;Goodness gracious!&#8221;</span><br />
And so went on to criticise&mdash;<br />
&#8220;Your room&#8217;s an inconvenient size:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It&#8217;s neither snug nor spacious.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;That narrow window, I expect,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Serves but to let the dusk in&mdash;&#8221;</span><br />
&#8220;But please,&#8221; said I, &#8220;to recollect<br />
&#8217;Twas fashioned by an architect<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Who pinned his faith on Ruskin!&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[Pg 24]</a></span><br />
&#8220;I don&#8217;t care who he was, Sir, or<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">On whom he pinned his faith!</span><br />
Constructed by whatever law,<br />
So poor a job I never saw,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">As I&#8217;m a living Wraith!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;What a re-markable cigar!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">How much are they a dozen?&#8221;</span><br />
I growled &#8220;No matter what they are!<br />
You&#8217;re getting as familiar<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">As if you were my cousin!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Now that&#8217;s a thing <i>I will not stand</i>,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And so I tell you flat.&#8221;</span><br />
&#8220;Aha,&#8221; said he, &#8220;we&#8217;re getting grand!&#8221;<br />
(Taking a bottle in his hand)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;I&#8217;ll soon arrange for <i>that</i>!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
And here he took a careful aim,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And gaily cried &#8220;Here goes!&#8221;</span><br />
I tried to dodge it as it came,<br />
But somehow caught it, all the same,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Exactly on my nose.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[Pg 25]</a></span><br />
And I remember nothing more<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That I can clearly fix,</span><br />
Till I was sitting on the floor,<br />
Repeating &#8220;Two and five are four,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">But <i>five and two</i> are six.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
What really passed I never learned,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Nor guessed: I only know</span><br />
That, when at last my sense returned,<br />
The lamp, neglected, dimly burned&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The fire was getting low&mdash;</span><br />
<br />
Through driving mists I seemed to see<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A Thing that smirked and smiled:</span><br />
And found that he was giving me<br />
A lesson in Biography,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">As if I were a child.</span></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[Pg 26]</a></span></p>
<h3>CANTO IV.</h3>
<h4>Hys Nouryture.</h4>

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<tr><td valign="top" rowspan="2"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i038left.jpg" alt="" /></td><td valign="top"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i038right.jpg" alt="" /></td></tr>
<tr><td>&#8220;Oh, when I was a little Ghost,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A merry time had we!</span><br />
Each seated on his favourite post,<br />
We chumped and chawed the buttered toast<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">They gave us for our tea.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;That story is in print!&#8221; I cried.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Don&#8217;t say it&#8217;s not, because</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[Pg 27]</a></span>It&#8217;s known as well as Bradshaw&#8217;s Guide!&#8221;<br />
(The Ghost uneasily replied<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He hardly thought it was).</span></td></tr></table>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;It&#8217;s not in Nursery Rhymes? And yet<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I almost think it is&mdash;</span><br />
&#8216;Three little Ghosteses&#8217; were set<br />
&#8216;On posteses,&#8217; you know, and ate<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Their &#8216;buttered toasteses.&#8217;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;I have the book; so, if you doubt it&mdash;&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I turned to search the shelf.</span><br />
&#8220;Don&#8217;t stir!&#8221; he cried. &#8220;We&#8217;ll do without it;<br />
I now remember all about it;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I wrote the thing myself.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;It came out in a &#8216;Monthly,&#8217; or<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">At least my agent said it did:</span><br />
Some literary swell, who saw<br />
It, thought it seemed adapted for<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The Magazine he edited.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;My father was a Brownie, Sir;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">My mother was a Fairy.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[Pg 28]</a></span>The notion had occurred to her,<br />
The children would be happier,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">If they were taught to vary.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The notion soon became a craze;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And, when it once began, she</span><br />
Brought us all out in different ways&mdash;<br />
One was a Pixy, two were Fays,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Another was a Banshee;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The Fetch and Kelpie went to school,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And gave a lot of trouble;</span><br />
Next came a Poltergeist and Ghoul,<br />
And then two Trolls (which broke the rule),<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A Goblin, and a Double&mdash;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;(If that&#8217;s a snuff-box on the shelf,&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He added with a yawn,</span><br />
&#8220;I&#8217;ll take a pinch)&mdash;next came an Elf,<br />
And then a Phantom (that&#8217;s myself),<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And last, a Leprechaun.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;One day, some Spectres chanced to call,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Dressed in the usual white:</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[Pg 29]</a></span>I stood and watched them in the hall,<br />
And couldn&#8217;t make them out at all,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">They seemed so strange a sight.</span></td></tr></table>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" summary="table">
<tr><td valign="top"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i041.jpg" alt="" /></td>
<td>&#8220;I wondered what on earth they were,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That looked all head and sack;</span><br />
But Mother told me not to stare,<br />
And then she twitched me by the hair,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And punched me in the back.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Since then I&#8217;ve often wished that I<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Had been a Spectre born.</span><br />
But what&#8217;s the use?&#8221; (He heaved a sigh).<br />
&#8220;<i>They</i> are the ghost-nobility,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And look on <i>us</i> with scorn.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;My phantom-life was soon begun:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">When I was barely six,</span><br />
I went out with an older one&mdash;<br />
And just at first I thought it fun,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And learned a lot of tricks.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[Pg 30]</a></span><br />
&#8220;I&#8217;ve haunted dungeons, castles, towers&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Wherever I was sent:</span><br />
I&#8217;ve often sat and howled for hours,<br />
Drenched to the skin with driving showers,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Upon a battlement.</span></td></tr></table>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;It&#8217;s quite old-fashioned now to groan<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">When you begin to speak:</span><br />
This is the newest thing in tone&mdash;&#8221;<br />
And here (it chilled me to the bone)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He gave an <i>awful</i> squeak.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Perhaps,&#8221; he added, &#8220;to <i>your</i> ear<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That sounds an easy thing?</span><br />
Try it yourself, my little dear!<br />
It took <i>me</i> something like a year,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With constant practising.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And when you&#8217;ve learned to squeak, my man<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And caught the double sob,</span><br />
You&#8217;re pretty much where you began:<br />
Just try and gibber if you can!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That&#8217;s something <i>like</i> a job!</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[Pg 31]</a></span><br />
&#8220;<i>I&#8217;ve</i> tried it, and can only say<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I&#8217;m sure you couldn&#8217;t do it, e-</span><br />
ven if you practised night and day,<br />
Unless you have a turn that way,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And natural ingenuity.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Shakspeare I think it is who treats<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Of Ghosts, in days of old,</span><br />
Who &#8216;gibbered in the Roman streets,&#8217;<br />
Dressed, if you recollect, in sheets&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">They must have found it cold.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;I&#8217;ve often spent ten pounds on stuff,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">In dressing as a Double;</span><br />
But, though it answers as a puff,<br />
It never has effect enough<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To make it worth the trouble.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Long bills soon quenched the little thirst<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I had for being funny.</span><br />
The setting-up is always worst:<br />
Such heaps of things you want at first,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">One must be made of money!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[Pg 32]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i044.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

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<tr><td>&#8220;For instance, take a Haunted Tower,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With skull, cross-bones, and sheet;</span><br />
Blue lights to burn (say) two an hour,<br />
Condensing lens of extra power,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And set of chains complete:</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;What with the things you have to hire&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The fitting on the robe&mdash;</span><br />
And testing all the coloured fire&mdash;<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[Pg 33]</a></span>The outfit of itself would tire<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The patience of a Job!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And then they&#8217;re so fastidious,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The Haunted-House Committee:</span><br />
I&#8217;ve often known them make a fuss<br />
Because a Ghost was French, or Russ,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Or even from the City!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Some dialects are objected to&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">For one, the <i>Irish</i> brogue is:</span><br />
And then, for all you have to do,<br />
One pound a week they offer you,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And find yourself in Bogies!&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[Pg 34]</a></span></p>
<h3>CANTO V.</h3>
<h4>Byckerment.</h4>

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<tr><td>&#8220;Don&#8217;t they consult the &#8216;Victims,&#8217; though?&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I said. &#8220;They should, by rights,</span><br />
Give them a chance&mdash;because, you know,<br />
The tastes of people differ so,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Especially in Sprites.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The Phantom shook his head and smiled.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Consult them? Not a bit!</span><br />
&#8217;Twould be a job to drive one wild,<br />
To satisfy one single child&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">There&#8217;d be no end to it!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Of course you can&#8217;t leave <i>children</i> free,&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Said I, &#8220;to pick and choose:</span><br />
But, in the case of men like me,<br />
I think &#8216;Mine Host&#8217; might fairly be<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Allowed to state his views.&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[Pg 35]</a></span><br />
He said &#8220;It really wouldn&#8217;t pay&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Folk are so full of fancies.</span><br />
We visit for a single day,<br />
And whether then we go, or stay,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Depends on circumstances.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And, though we don&#8217;t consult &#8216;Mine Host&#8217;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Before the thing&#8217;s arranged,</span><br />
Still, if he often quits his post,<br />
Or is not a well-mannered Ghost,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Then you can have him changed.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;But if the host&#8217;s a man like you&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I mean a man of sense;</span><br />
And if the house is not too new&mdash;&#8221;<br />
&#8220;Why, what has <i>that</i>,&#8221; said I, &#8220;to do<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With Ghost&#8217;s convenience?&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;A new house does not suit, you know&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It&#8217;s such a job to trim it:</span><br />
But, after twenty years or so,<br />
The wainscotings begin to go,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">So twenty is the limit.&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[Pg 36]</a></span><br />
&#8220;To trim&#8221; was not a phrase I could<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Remember having heard:</span><br />
&#8220;Perhaps,&#8221; I said, &#8220;you&#8217;ll be so good<br />
As tell me what is understood<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Exactly by that word?&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i048.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;It means the loosening all the doors,&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The Ghost replied, and laughed:</span><br />
&#8220;It means the drilling holes by scores<br />
In all the skirting-boards and floors,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To make a thorough draught.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[Pg 37]</a></span><br />
&#8220;You&#8217;ll sometimes find that one or two<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Are all you really need</span><br />
To let the wind come whistling through&mdash;<br />
But <i>here</i> there&#8217;ll be a lot to do!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I faintly gasped &#8220;Indeed!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;If I&#8217;d been rather later, I&#8217;ll<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Be bound,&#8221; I added, trying</span><br />
(Most unsuccessfully) to smile,<br />
&#8220;You&#8217;d have been busy all this while,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Trimming and beautifying?&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Why, no,&#8221; said he; &#8220;perhaps I should<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Have stayed another minute&mdash;</span><br />
But still no Ghost, that&#8217;s any good,<br />
Without an introduction would<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Have ventured to begin it.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The proper thing, as you were late,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Was certainly to go:</span><br />
But, with the roads in such a state,<br />
I got the Knight-Mayor&#8217;s leave to wait<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">For half an hour or so.&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[Pg 38]</a></span><br />
&#8220;Who&#8217;s the Knight-Mayor?&#8221; I cried. Instead<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Of answering my question,</span><br />
&#8220;Well! If you don&#8217;t know <i>that</i>,&#8221; he said,<br />
&#8220;Either you never go to bed,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Or you&#8217;ve a grand digestion!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;He goes about and sits on folk<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That eat too much at night:</span><br />
His duties are to pinch, and poke,<br />
And squeeze them till they nearly choke.&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">(I said &#8220;It serves them right!&#8221;)</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And folk that sup on things like these&mdash;&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He muttered, &#8220;eggs and bacon&mdash;</span><br />
Lobster&mdash;and duck&mdash;and toasted cheese&mdash;<br />
If they don&#8217;t get an awful squeeze,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I&#8217;m very much mistaken!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;He is immensely fat, and so<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Well suits the occupation:</span><br />
In point of fact, if you must know,<br />
We used to call him, years ago,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>The Mayor and Corporation</i>!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[Pg 39]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i051.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;HE GOES ABOUT AND SITS ON FOLK&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[Pg 40]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;The day he was elected Mayor<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I <i>know</i> that every Sprite meant</span><br />
To vote for <i>me</i>, but did not dare&mdash;<br />
He was so frantic with despair<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And furious with excitement.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i052.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;When it was over, for a whim,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He ran to tell the King;</span><br />
And being the reverse of slim,<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[Pg 41]</a></span>A two-mile trot was not for him<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A very easy thing.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;So, to reward him for his run<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">(As it was baking hot,</span><br />
And he was over twenty stone),<br />
The King proceeded, half in fun,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To knight him on the spot.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;&#8217;Twas a great liberty to take!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">(I fired up like a rocket).</span><br />
&#8220;He did it just for punning&#8217;s sake:<br />
&#8216;The man,&#8217; says Johnson, &#8216;that would make<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A pun, would pick a pocket!&#8217;&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;A man,&#8221; said he, &#8220;is not a King.&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I argued for a while,</span><br />
And did my best to prove the thing&mdash;<br />
The Phantom merely listening<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With a contemptuous smile.</span><br />
<br />
At last, when, breath and patience spent,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I had recourse to smoking&mdash;</span><br />
&#8220;Your <i>aim</i>,&#8221; he said, &#8220;is excellent:<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[Pg 42]</a></span>But&mdash;when you call it <i>argument</i>&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Of course you&#8217;re only joking?&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i054.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Stung by his cold and snaky eye,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I roused myself at length</span><br />
To say &#8220;At least I do defy<br />
The veriest sceptic to deny<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That union is strength!&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[Pg 43]</a></span><br />
&#8220;That&#8217;s true enough,&#8221; said he, &#8220;yet stay&mdash;&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I listened in all meekness&mdash;</span><br />
&#8220;<i>Union</i> is strength, I&#8217;m bound to say;<br />
In fact, the thing&#8217;s as clear as day;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">But <i>onions</i>&mdash;are a weakness.&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[Pg 44]</a></span></p>
<h3>CANTO VI.</h3>
<h4>Dyscomfyture.</h4>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>As one who strives a hill to climb,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Who never climbed before:</span><br />
Who finds it, in a little time,<br />
Grow every moment less sublime,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And votes the thing a bore:</span><br />
<br />
Yet, having once begun to try,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Dares not desert his quest,</span><br />
But, climbing, ever keeps his eye<br />
On one small hut against the sky,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Wherein he hopes to rest:</span><br />
<br />
Who climbs till nerve and force are spent,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With many a puff and pant:</span><br />
Who still, as rises the ascent,<br />
In language grows more violent,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Although in breath more scant:</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[Pg 45]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" summary="table">
<tr><td valign="top" rowspan="2"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i057left.jpg" alt="" /></td><td valign="top"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i057right.jpg" alt="" /></td></tr>
<tr><td>Who, climbing, gains at length the place<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That crowns the upward track;</span><br />
And, entering with unsteady pace,<br />
Receives a buffet in the face<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That lands him on his back:</span><br />
<br />
And feels himself, like one in sleep,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Glide swiftly down again,</span><br />
A helpless weight, from steep to steep,<br />
Till, with a headlong giddy sweep,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He drops upon the plain&mdash;</span><br />
<br />
So I, that had resolved to bring<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Conviction to a ghost,</span><br />
And found it quite a different thing<br />
From any human arguing,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Yet dared not quit my post</span></td></tr></table>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[Pg 46]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>But, keeping still the end in view<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To which I hoped to come,</span><br />
I strove to prove the matter true<br />
By putting everything I knew<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Into an axiom:</span><br />
<br />
Commencing every single phrase<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">With &#8216;therefore&#8217; or &#8216;because,&#8217;</span><br />
I blindly reeled, a hundred ways,<br />
About the syllogistic maze,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Unconscious where I was.</span><br />
<br />
Quoth he &#8220;That&#8217;s regular clap-trap:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Don&#8217;t bluster any more.</span><br />
Now <i>do</i> be cool and take a nap!<br />
Such a ridiculous old chap<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Was never seen before!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;You&#8217;re like a man I used to meet,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Who got one day so furious</span><br />
In arguing, the simple heat<br />
Scorched both his slippers off his feet!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I said &#8220;<i>That&#8217;s very curious!</i>&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[Pg 47]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i059.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;SCORCHED BOTH HIS SLIPPERS OFF HIS FEET&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[Pg 48]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;Well, it <i>is</i> curious, I agree,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And sounds perhaps like fibs:</span><br />
But still it&#8217;s true as true can be&mdash;<br />
As sure as your name&#8217;s Tibbs,&#8221; said he.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I said &#8220;My name&#8217;s <i>not</i> Tibbs.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;<i>Not</i> Tibbs!&#8221; he cried&mdash;his tone became<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A shade or two less hearty&mdash;</span><br />
&#8220;Why, no,&#8221; said I. &#8220;My proper name<br />
Is Tibbets&mdash;&#8221; &#8220;Tibbets?&#8221; &#8220;Aye, the same.&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Why, then <span class="smcaplc">YOU&#8217;RE NOT THE PARTY</span>!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
With that he struck the board a blow<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That shivered half the glasses.</span><br />
&#8220;Why couldn&#8217;t you have told me so<br />
Three quarters of an hour ago,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">You prince of all the asses?</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;To walk four miles through mud and rain,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To spend the night in smoking,</span><br />
And then to find that it&#8217;s in vain&mdash;<br />
And I&#8217;ve to do it all again&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It&#8217;s really <i>too</i> provoking!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49">[Pg 49]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i061.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;Don&#8217;t talk!&#8221; he cried, as I began<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To mutter some excuse.</span><br />
&#8220;Who can have patience with a man<br />
That&#8217;s got no more discretion than<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">An idiotic goose?</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[Pg 50]</a></span><br />
&#8220;To keep me waiting here, instead<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Of telling me at once</span><br />
That this was not the house!&#8221; he said.<br />
&#8220;There, that&#8217;ll do&mdash;be off to bed!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Don&#8217;t gape like that, you dunce!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;It&#8217;s very fine to throw the blame<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">On <i>me</i> in such a fashion!</span><br />
Why didn&#8217;t you enquire my name<br />
The very minute that you came?&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I answered in a passion.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Of course it worries you a bit<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To come so far on foot&mdash;</span><br />
But how was <i>I</i> to blame for it?&#8221;<br />
&#8220;Well, well!&#8221; said he. &#8220;I must admit<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That isn&#8217;t badly put.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And certainly you&#8217;ve given me<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The best of wine and victual&mdash;</span><br />
Excuse my violence,&#8221; said he,<br />
&#8220;But accidents like this, you see,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">They put one out a little.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[Pg 51]</a></span><br />
&#8220;&#8217;Twas <i>my</i> fault after all, I find&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Shake hands, old Turnip-top!&#8221;</span><br />
The name was hardly to my mind,<br />
But, as no doubt he meant it kind,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I let the matter drop.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Good-night, old Turnip-top, good-night!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">When I am gone, perhaps</span><br />
They&#8217;ll send you some inferior Sprite,<br />
Who&#8217;ll keep you in a constant fright<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And spoil your soundest naps.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Tell him you&#8217;ll stand no sort of trick;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Then, if he leers and chuckles,</span><br />
You just be handy with a stick<br />
(Mind that it&#8217;s pretty hard and thick)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And rap him on the knuckles!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Then carelessly remark &#8216;Old coon!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Perhaps you&#8217;re not aware</span><br />
That, if you don&#8217;t behave, you&#8217;ll soon<br />
Be chuckling to another tune&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And so you&#8217;d best take care!&#8217;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[Pg 52]</a></span><br />
&#8220;That&#8217;s the right way to cure a Sprite<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Of such-like goings-on&mdash;</span><br />
But gracious me! It&#8217;s getting light!<br />
Good-night, old Turnip-top, good-night!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A nod, and he was gone.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i064.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[Pg 53]</a></span></p>
<h3>CANTO VII.</h3>
<h4>Sad Souvenaunce.</h4>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i065.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;What&#8217;s this?&#8221; I pondered. &#8220;Have I slept?<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Or can I have been drinking?&#8221;</span><br />
But soon a gentler feeling crept<br />
Upon me, and I sat and wept<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">An hour or so, like winking.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;No need for Bones to hurry so!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I sobbed. &#8220;In fact, I doubt</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_54" id="Page_54">[Pg 54]</a></span>If it was worth his while to go&mdash;<br />
And who is Tibbs, I&#8217;d like to know,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To make such work about?</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;If Tibbs is anything like me,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It&#8217;s <i>possible</i>,&#8221; I said,</span><br />
&#8220;He won&#8217;t be over-pleased to be<br />
Dropped in upon at half-past three,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">After he&#8217;s snug in bed.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And if Bones plagues him anyhow&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Squeaking and all the rest of it,</span><br />
As he was doing here just now&mdash;<br />
<i>I</i> prophesy there&#8217;ll be a row,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And Tibbs will have the best of it!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Then, as my tears could never bring<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The friendly Phantom back,</span><br />
It seemed to me the proper thing<br />
To mix another glass, and sing<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The following Coronach.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[Pg 55]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i067.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;AND TIBBS WILL HAVE THE BEST OF IT&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[Pg 56]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8216;<i>And art thou gone, beloved Ghost?</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>Best of Familiars!</i></span><br />
<i>Nay then, farewell, my duckling roast,</i><br />
<i>Farewell, farewell, my tea and toast,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>My meerschaum and cigars!</i></span><br />
<br />
&#8216;<i>The hues of life are dull and gray,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>The sweets of life insipid,</i></span><br />
<i>When thou, my charmer, art away&mdash;</i><br />
<i>Old Brick, or rather, let me say,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;"><i>Old Parallelepiped!</i>&#8217;</span><br />
<br />
Instead of singing Verse the Third,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I ceased&mdash;abruptly, rather:</span><br />
But, after such a splendid word,<br />
I felt that it would be absurd<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To try it any farther.</span><br />
<br />
So with a yawn I went my way<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To seek the welcome downy,</span><br />
And slept, and dreamed till break of day<br />
Of Poltergeist and Fetch and Fay<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And Leprechaun and Brownie!</span><br />
<br />
For years I&#8217;ve not been visited<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">By any kind of Sprite;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[Pg 57]</a></span>Yet still they echo in my head,<br />
Those parting words, so kindly said,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Old Turnip-top, good-night!&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i069.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[Pg 58]</a></span></p>
<h2>ECHOES.</h2>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td><span style="margin-left: 4em;">Lady Clara Vere de Vere</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Was eight years old, she said:</span><br />
Every ringlet, lightly shaken, ran itself in golden thread.<br />
<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">She took her little porringer:</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Of me she shall not win renown:</span><br />
For the baseness of its nature shall have strength to drag her down.<br />
<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">&#8220;Sisters and brothers, little Maid?</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">There stands the Inspector at thy door:</span><br />
Like a dog, he hunts for boys who know not two and two are four.&#8221;<br />
<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">&#8220;Kind words are more than coronets,&#8221;</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">She said, and wondering looked at me:</span><br />
&#8220;It is the dead unhappy night, and I must hurry home to tea.&#8221;</td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[Pg 59]</a></span></p>
<h2>A SEA DIRGE.</h2>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i071.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>There are certain things&mdash;as, a spider, a ghost,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The income-tax, gout, an umbrella for three&mdash;</span><br />
That I hate, but the thing that I hate the most<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">Is a thing they call the Sea.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_60" id="Page_60">[Pg 60]</a></span><br />
Pour some salt water over the floor&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Ugly I&#8217;m sure you&#8217;ll allow it to be:</span><br />
Suppose it extended a mile or more,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;"><i>That&#8217;s</i> very like the Sea.</span><br />
<br />
Beat a dog till it howls outright&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Cruel, but all very well for a spree:</span><br />
Suppose that he did so day and night,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;"><i>That</i> would be like the Sea.</span><br />
<br />
I had a vision of nursery-maids;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Tens of thousands passed by me&mdash;</span><br />
All leading children with wooden spades,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">And this was by the Sea.</span><br />
<br />
Who invented those spades of wood?<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Who was it cut them out of the tree?</span><br />
None, I think, but an idiot could&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">Or one that loved the Sea.</span><br />
<br />
It is pleasant and dreamy, no doubt, to float<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With &#8216;thoughts as boundless, and souls as free&#8217;:</span><br />
But, suppose you are very unwell in the boat,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">How do you like the Sea?</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[Pg 61]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i073.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;AND THIS WAS BY THE SEA&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[Pg 62]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>There is an insect that people avoid<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Whence is derived the verb &#8216;to flee&#8217;).</span><br />
Where have you been by it most annoyed?<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">In lodgings by the Sea.</span><br />
<br />
If you like your coffee with sand for dregs,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A decided hint of salt in your tea,</span><br />
And a fishy taste in the very eggs&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">By all means choose the Sea.</span><br />
<br />
And if, with these dainties to drink and eat,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You prefer not a vestige of grass or tree,</span><br />
And a chronic state of wet in your feet,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Then&mdash;I recommend the Sea.</span><br />
<br />
For <i>I</i> have friends who dwell by the coast&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Pleasant friends they are to me!</span><br />
It is when I am with them I wonder most<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">That any one likes the Sea.</span><br />
<br />
They take me a walk: though tired and stiff,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To climb the heights I madly agree;</span><br />
And, after a tumble or so from the cliff,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">They kindly suggest the Sea.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[Pg 63]</a></span><br />
I try the rocks, and I think it cool<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That they laugh with such an excess of glee,</span><br />
As I heavily slip into every pool<br />
<span style="margin-left: 3em;">That skirts the cold cold Sea.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i075.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[Pg 64]</a></span></p>
<h2>Y<sup>e</sup> Carpette Knyghte.</h2>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>I have a horse&mdash;a ryghte goode horse&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Ne doe I envye those</span><br />
Who scoure y<sup>e</sup> playne yn headye course<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Tyll soddayne on theyre nose</span><br />
They lyghte wyth unexpected force&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Yt ys&mdash;a horse of clothes.</span><br />
<br />
I have a saddel&mdash;&#8220;Say&#8217;st thou soe?<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Wyth styrruppes, Knyghte, to boote?&#8221;</span><br />
I sayde not that&mdash;I answere &#8220;Noe&#8221;&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Yt lacketh such, I woote:</span><br />
Yt ys a mutton-saddel, loe!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Parte of y<sup>e</sup> fleecye brute.</span><br />
<br />
I have a bytte&mdash;a ryghte good bytte&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">As shall bee seene yn tyme.</span><br />
Y<sup>e</sup> jawe of horse yt wyll not fytte;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Yts use ys more sublyme.</span><br />
Fayre Syr, how deemest thou of yt?<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Yt ys&mdash;thys bytte of rhyme.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[Pg 65]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i077.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;I HAVE A HORSE&#8221;</small></p>



<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_66" id="Page_66">[Pg 66]</a></span></p>
<h2>HIAWATHA&#8217;S PHOTOGRAPHING.</h2>

<p class="note">[In an age of imitation, I can claim no special merit for this slight
attempt at doing what is known to be so easy. Any fairly practised writer,
with the slightest ear for rhythm, could compose, for hours together, in
the easy running metre of &#8216;The Song of Hiawatha.&#8217; Having, then, distinctly
stated that I challenge no attention in the following little poem to its
merely verbal jingle, I must beg the candid reader to confine his
criticism to its treatment of the subject.]</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>From his shoulder Hiawatha<br />
Took the camera of rosewood,<br />
Made of sliding, folding rosewood;<br />
Neatly put it all together.<br />
In its case it lay compactly,<br />
Folded into nearly nothing;<br />
But he opened out the hinges,<br />
Pushed and pulled the joints and hinges,<br />
Till it looked all squares and oblongs,<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[Pg 67]</a></span>Like a complicated figure<br />
In the Second Book of Euclid.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i079.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td><span style="margin-left: 1em;">This he perched upon a tripod&mdash;</span><br />
Crouched beneath its dusky cover&mdash;<br />
Stretched his hand, enforcing silence&mdash;<br />
Said &#8220;Be motionless, I beg you!&#8221;<br />
Mystic, awful was the process.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">All the family in order</span><br />
Sat before him for their pictures:<br />
Each in turn, as he was taken,<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_68" id="Page_68">[Pg 68]</a></span>Volunteered his own suggestions,<br />
His ingenious suggestions.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">First the Governor, the Father:</span><br />
He suggested velvet curtains<br />
Looped about a massy pillar;<br />
And the corner of a table,<br />
Of a rosewood dining-table.<br />
He would hold a scroll of something,<br />
Hold it firmly in his left-hand;<br />
He would keep his right-hand buried<br />
(Like Napoleon) in his waistcoat;<br />
He would contemplate the distance<br />
With a look of pensive meaning,<br />
As of ducks that die in tempests.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Grand, heroic was the notion:</span><br />
Yet the picture failed entirely:<br />
Failed, because he moved a little,<br />
Moved, because he couldn&#8217;t help it.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Next, his better half took courage;</span><br />
She would have her picture taken.<br />
<i>She</i> came dressed beyond description,<br />
Dressed in jewels and in satin<br />
Far too gorgeous for an empress.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[Pg 69]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i081.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;FIRST THE GOVERNOR, THE FATHER&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_70" id="Page_70">[Pg 70]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Gracefully she sat down sideways,<br />
With a simper scarcely human,<br />
Holding in her hand a bouquet<br />
Rather larger than a cabbage.<br />
All the while that she was sitting,<br />
Still the lady chattered, chattered,<br />
Like a monkey in the forest.<br />
&#8220;Am I sitting still?&#8221; she asked him.<br />
&#8220;Is my face enough in profile?<br />
Shall I hold the bouquet higher?<br />
Will it come into the picture?&#8221;<br />
And the picture failed completely.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Next the Son, the Stunning-Cantab:</span><br />
He suggested curves of beauty,<br />
Curves pervading all his figure,<br />
Which the eye might follow onward,<br />
Till they centered in the breast-pin,<br />
Centered in the golden breast-pin.<br />
He had learnt it all from Ruskin<br />
(Author of &#8216;The Stones of Venice,&#8217;<br />
&#8216;Seven Lamps of Architecture,&#8217;<br />
&#8216;Modern Painters,&#8217; and some others);<br />
And perhaps he had not fully<br />
Understood his author&#8217;s meaning;<br />
But, whatever was the reason,<br />
All was fruitless, as the picture<br />
Ended in an utter failure.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71">[Pg 71]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i083.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;NEXT THE SON, THE STUNNING-CANTAB&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[Pg 72]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Next to him the eldest daughter:</span><br />
She suggested very little,<br />
Only asked if he would take her<br />
With her look of &#8216;passive beauty.&#8217;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Her idea of passive beauty</span><br />
Was a squinting of the left-eye,<br />
Was a drooping of the right-eye,<br />
Was a smile that went up sideways<br />
To the corner of the nostrils.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Hiawatha, when she asked him,</span><br />
Took no notice of the question,<br />
Looked as if he hadn&#8217;t heard it;<br />
But, when pointedly appealed to,<br />
Smiled in his peculiar manner,<br />
Coughed and said it &#8216;didn&#8217;t matter,&#8217;<br />
Bit his lip and changed the subject.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Nor in this was he mistaken,</span><br />
As the picture failed completely.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So in turn the other sisters.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[Pg 73]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i085.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;NEXT TO HIM THE ELDEST DAUGHTER&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[Pg 74]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Last, the youngest son was taken:</span><br />
Very rough and thick his hair was,<br />
Very round and red his face was,<br />
Very dusty was his jacket,<br />
Very fidgety his manner.<br />
And his overbearing sisters<br />
Called him names he disapproved of:<br />
Called him Johnny, &#8216;Daddy&#8217;s Darling,&#8217;<br />
Called him Jacky, &#8216;Scrubby School-boy.&#8217;<br />
And, so awful was the picture,<br />
In comparison the others<br />
Seemed, to one&#8217;s bewildered fancy,<br />
To have partially succeeded.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Finally my Hiawatha</span><br />
Tumbled all the tribe together,<br />
(&#8216;Grouped&#8217; is not the right expression),<br />
And, as happy chance would have it,<br />
Did at last obtain a picture<br />
Where the faces all succeeded:<br />
Each came out a perfect likeness.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75">[Pg 75]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i087.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;LAST, THE YOUNGEST SON WAS TAKEN&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[Pg 76]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td><span style="margin-left: 1em;">Then they joined and all abused it,</span><br />
Unrestrainedly abused it,<br />
As the worst and ugliest picture<br />
They could possibly have dreamed of.<br />
Giving one such strange expressions&mdash;<br />
Sullen, stupid, pert expressions.<br />
Really any one would take us<br />
(Any one that did not know us)<br />
For the most unpleasant people!&#8217;<br />
(Hiawatha seemed to think so,<br />
Seemed to think it not unlikely).<br />
All together rang their voices,<br />
Angry, loud, discordant voices,<br />
As of dogs that howl in concert,<br />
As of cats that wail in chorus.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But my Hiawatha&#8217;s patience,</span><br />
His politeness and his patience,<br />
Unaccountably had vanished,<br />
And he left that happy party.<br />
Neither did he leave them slowly,<br />
With the calm deliberation,<br />
The intense deliberation<br />
Of a photographic artist:<br />
But he left them in a hurry,<br />
Left them in a mighty hurry,<br />
Stating that he would not stand it,<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[Pg 77]</a></span>Stating in emphatic language<br />
What he&#8217;d be before he&#8217;d stand it.<br />
Hurriedly he packed his boxes:<br />
Hurriedly the porter trundled<br />
On a barrow all his boxes:<br />
Hurriedly he took his ticket:<br />
Hurriedly the train received him:<br />
Thus departed Hiawatha.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i089.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[Pg 78]</a></span></p>
<h2>MELANCHOLETTA.</h2>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>With saddest music all day long<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">She soothed her secret sorrow:</span><br />
At night she sighed &#8220;I fear &#8217;twas wrong<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Such cheerful words to borrow.</span><br />
Dearest, a sweeter, sadder song<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I&#8217;ll sing to thee to-morrow.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
I thanked her, but I could not say<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That I was glad to hear it:</span><br />
I left the house at break of day,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And did not venture near it</span><br />
Till time, I hoped, had worn away<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Her grief, for nought could cheer it!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[Pg 79]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i091.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;AT NIGHT SHE SIGHED&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[Pg 80]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>My dismal sister! Couldst thou know<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The wretched home thou keepest!</span><br />
Thy brother, drowned in daily woe,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is thankful when thou sleepest;</span><br />
For if I laugh, however low,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When thou&#8217;rt awake, thou weepest!</span><br />
<br />
I took my sister t&#8217;other day<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Excuse the slang expression)</span><br />
To Sadler&#8217;s Wells to see the play,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In hopes the new impression</span><br />
Might in her thoughts, from grave to gay<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Effect some slight digression.</span><br />
<br />
I asked three gay young dogs from town<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To join us in our folly,</span><br />
Whose mirth, I thought, might serve to drown<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">My sister&#8217;s melancholy:</span><br />
The lively Jones, the sportive Brown,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And Robinson the jolly.</span><br />
<br />
The maid announced the meal in tones<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That I myself had taught her,</span><br />
Meant to allay my sister&#8217;s moans<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Like oil on troubled water:</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[Pg 81]</a></span>I rushed to Jones, the lively Jones,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And begged him to escort her.</span><br />
<br />
Vainly he strove, with ready wit,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To joke about the weather&mdash;</span><br />
To ventilate the last &#8216;<i>on dit</i>&#8217;&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To quote the price of leather&mdash;</span><br />
She groaned &#8220;Here I and Sorrow sit:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Let us lament together!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
I urged &#8220;You&#8217;re wasting time, you know:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Delay will spoil the venison.&#8221;</span><br />
&#8220;My heart is wasted with my woe!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">There is no rest&mdash;in Venice, on</span><br />
The Bridge of Sighs!&#8221; she quoted low<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From Byron and from Tennyson.</span><br />
<br />
I need not tell of soup and fish<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In solemn silence swallowed,</span><br />
The sobs that ushered in each dish,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And its departure followed,</span><br />
Nor yet my suicidal wish<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To <i>be</i> the cheese I hollowed.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[Pg 82]</a></span><br />
Some desperate attempts were made<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To start a conversation;</span><br />
&#8220;Madam,&#8221; the sportive Brown essayed,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Which kind of recreation,</span><br />
Hunting or fishing, have you made<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Your special occupation?&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Her lips curved downwards instantly,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As if of india-rubber.</span><br />
&#8220;Hounds <i>in full cry</i> I like,&#8221; said she:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Oh how I longed to snub her!)</span><br />
&#8220;Of fish, a whale&#8217;s the one for me,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>It is so full of blubber</i>!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The night&#8217;s performance was &#8220;King John.&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;It&#8217;s dull,&#8221; she wept, &#8220;and so-so!&#8221;</span><br />
A while I let her tears flow on,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">She said they soothed her woe so!</span><br />
At length the curtain rose upon<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8216;Bombastes Furioso.&#8217;</span><br />
<br />
In vain we roared; in vain we tried<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To rouse her into laughter:</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[Pg 83]</a></span>Her pensive glances wandered wide<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From orchestra to rafter&mdash;</span><br />
&#8220;<i>Tier upon tier!</i>&#8221; she said, and sighed;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And silence followed after.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i095.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[Pg 84]</a></span></p>
<h2>A VALENTINE.</h2>

<p class="note">[Sent to a friend who had complained that I was glad enough to see him
when he came, but didn&#8217;t seem to miss him if he stayed away.]</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>And cannot pleasures, while they last,<br />
Be actual unless, when past,<br />
They leave us shuddering and aghast,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">With anguish smarting?</span><br />
And cannot friends be firm and fast,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">And yet bear parting?</span><br />
<br />
And must I then, at Friendship&#8217;s call,<br />
Calmly resign the little all<br />
(Trifling, I grant, it is and small)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">I have of gladness,</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[Pg 85]</a></span>And lend my being to the thrall<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Of gloom and sadness?</span><br />
<br />
And think you that I should be dumb,<br />
And full <i>dolorum omnium</i>,<br />
Excepting when <i>you</i> choose to come<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">And share my dinner?</span><br />
At other times be sour and glum<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">And daily thinner?</span><br />
<br />
Must he then only live to weep,<br />
Who&#8217;d prove his friendship true and deep?<br />
By day a lonely shadow creep,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">At night-time languish,</span><br />
Oft raising in his broken sleep<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">The moan of anguish?</span><br />
<br />
The lover, if for certain days<br />
His fair one be denied his gaze,<br />
Sinks not in grief and wild amaze,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">But, wiser wooer,</span><br />
He spends the time in writing lays,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">And posts them to her.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[Pg 86]</a></span><br />
And if the verse flow free and fast,<br />
Till even the poet is aghast,<br />
A touching Valentine at last<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">The post shall carry,</span><br />
When thirteen days are gone and past<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Of February.</span><br />
<br />
Farewell, dear friend, and when we meet,<br />
In desert waste or crowded street,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Perhaps before this week shall fleet,</span><br />
Perhaps to-morrow,<br />
I trust to find <i>your</i> heart the seat<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4em;">Of wasting sorrow.</span></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_87" id="Page_87">[Pg 87]</a></span></p>
<h2>THE THREE VOICES.</h2>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3>The First Voice.</h3>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i099.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>He trilled a carol fresh and free:<br />
He laughed aloud for very glee:<br />
There came a breeze from off the sea:<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_88" id="Page_88">[Pg 88]</a></span><br />
It passed athwart the glooming flat&mdash;<br />
It fanned his forehead as he sat&mdash;<br />
It lightly bore away his hat,<br />
<br />
All to the feet of one who stood<br />
Like maid enchanted in a wood,<br />
Frowning as darkly as she could.<br />
<br />
With huge umbrella, lank and brown,<br />
Unerringly she pinned it down,<br />
Right through the centre of the crown.<br />
<br />
Then, with an aspect cold and grim,<br />
Regardless of its battered rim,<br />
She took it up and gave it him.<br />
<br />
A while like one in dreams he stood,<br />
Then faltered forth his gratitude<br />
In words just short of being rude:<br />
<br />
For it had lost its shape and shine,<br />
And it had cost him four-and-nine,<br />
And he was going out to dine.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_89" id="Page_89">[Pg 89]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i101.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;UNERRINGLY SHE PINNED IT DOWN.&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_90" id="Page_90">[Pg 90]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;To dine!&#8221; she sneered in acid tone.<br />
&#8220;To bend thy being to a bone<br />
Clothed in a radiance not its own!&#8221;<br />
<br />
The tear-drop trickled to his chin:<br />
There was a meaning in her grin<br />
That made him feel on fire within.<br />
<br />
&#8220;Term it not &#8216;radiance,&#8217;&#8221; said he:<br />
&#8220;&#8217;Tis solid nutriment to me.<br />
Dinner is Dinner: Tea is Tea.&#8221;<br />
<br />
And she &#8220;Yea so? Yet wherefore cease?<br />
Let thy scant knowledge find increase.<br />
Say &#8216;Men are Men, and Geese are Geese.&#8217;&#8221;<br />
<br />
He moaned: he knew not what to say.<br />
The thought &#8220;That I could get away!&#8221;<br />
Strove with the thought &#8220;But I must stay.&#8221;<br />
<br />
&#8220;To dine!&#8221; she shrieked in dragon-wrath.<br />
&#8220;To swallow wines all foam and froth!<br />
To simper at a table-cloth!<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_91" id="Page_91">[Pg 91]</a></span><br />
&#8220;Say, can thy noble spirit stoop<br />
To join the gormandising troop<br />
Who find a solace in the soup?<br />
<br />
&#8220;Canst thou desire or pie or puff?<br />
Thy well-bred manners were enough,<br />
Without such gross material stuff.&#8221;<br />
<br />
&#8220;Yet well-bred men,&#8221; he faintly said,<br />
&#8220;Are not unwilling to be fed:<br />
Nor are they well without the bread.&#8221;<br />
<br />
Her visage scorched him ere she spoke:<br />
&#8220;There are,&#8221; she said, &#8220;a kind of folk<br />
Who have no horror of a joke.<br />
<br />
&#8220;Such wretches live: they take their share<br />
Of common earth and common air:<br />
We come across them here and there:<br />
<br />
&#8220;We grant them&mdash;there is no escape&mdash;<br />
A sort of semi-human shape<br />
Suggestive of the man-like Ape.&#8221;<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_92" id="Page_92">[Pg 92]</a></span><br />
&#8220;In all such theories,&#8221; said he,<br />
&#8220;One fixed exception there must be.<br />
That is, the Present Company.&#8221;<br />
<br />
Baffled, she gave a wolfish bark:<br />
He, aiming blindly in the dark,<br />
With random shaft had pierced the mark.<br />
<br />
She felt that her defeat was plain,<br />
Yet madly strove with might and main<br />
To get the upper hand again.<br />
<br />
Fixing her eyes upon the beach,<br />
As though unconscious of his speech,<br />
She said &#8220;Each gives to more than each.&#8221;<br />
<br />
He could not answer yea or nay:<br />
He faltered &#8220;Gifts may pass away.&#8221;<br />
Yet knew not what he meant to say.<br />
<br />
&#8220;If that be so,&#8221; she straight replied,<br />
&#8220;Each heart with each doth coincide.<br />
What boots it? For the world is wide.&#8221;</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_93" id="Page_93">[Pg 93]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i105.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;HE FALTERED &#8216;GIFTS MAY PASS AWAY.&#8217;&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_94" id="Page_94">[Pg 94]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;The world is but a Thought,&#8221; said he:<br />
&#8220;The vast unfathomable sea<br />
Is but a Notion&mdash;unto me.&#8221;<br />
<br />
And darkly fell her answer dread<br />
Upon his unresisting head,<br />
Like half a hundredweight of lead.<br />
<br />
&#8220;The Good and Great must ever shun<br />
That reckless and abandoned one<br />
Who stoops to perpetrate a pun.<br />
<br />
&#8220;The man that smokes&mdash;that reads the <i>Times</i>&mdash;<br />
That goes to Christmas Pantomimes&mdash;<br />
Is capable of <i>any</i> crimes!&#8221;<br />
<br />
He felt it was his turn to speak,<br />
And, with a shamed and crimson cheek,<br />
Moaned &#8220;This is harder than Bezique!&#8221;<br />
<br />
But when she asked him &#8220;Wherefore so?&#8221;<br />
He felt his very whiskers glow,<br />
And frankly owned &#8220;I do not know.&#8221;</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_95" id="Page_95">[Pg 95]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i107.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;THIS IS HARDER THAN BEZIQUE!&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_96" id="Page_96">[Pg 96]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>While, like broad waves of golden grain,<br />
Or sunlit hues on cloistered pane,<br />
His colour came and went again.<br />
<br />
Pitying his obvious distress,<br />
Yet with a tinge of bitterness,<br />
She said &#8220;The More exceeds the Less.&#8221;<br />
<br />
&#8220;A truth of such undoubted weight,&#8221;<br />
He urged, &#8220;and so extreme in date,<br />
It were superfluous to state.&#8221;<br />
<br />
Roused into sudden passion, she<br />
In tone of cold malignity:<br />
&#8220;To others, yea: but not to thee.&#8221;<br />
<br />
But when she saw him quail and quake,<br />
And when he urged &#8220;For pity&#8217;s sake!&#8221;<br />
Once more in gentle tone she spake.<br />
<br />
&#8220;Thought in the mind doth still abide:<br />
That is by Intellect supplied,<br />
And within that Idea doth hide:<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_97" id="Page_97">[Pg 97]</a></span><br />
&#8220;And he, that yearns the truth to know,<br />
Still further inwardly may go,<br />
And find Idea from Notion flow:<br />
<br />
&#8220;And thus the chain, that sages sought,<br />
Is to a glorious circle wrought,<br />
For Notion hath its source in Thought.&#8221;<br />
<br />
So passed they on with even pace:<br />
Yet gradually one might trace<br />
A shadow growing on his face.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i109.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_98" id="Page_98">[Pg 98]</a></span></p>
<h3>The Second Voice.</h3>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i110.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>They walked beside the wave-worn beach;<br />
Her tongue was very apt to teach,<br />
And now and then he did beseech<br />
<br />
She would abate her dulcet tone,<br />
Because the talk was all her own,<br />
And he was dull as any drone.<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_99" id="Page_99">[Pg 99]</a></span><br />
She urged &#8220;No cheese is made of chalk&#8221;:<br />
And ceaseless flowed her dreary talk,<br />
Tuned to the footfall of a walk.<br />
<br />
Her voice was very full and rich,<br />
And, when at length she asked him &#8220;Which?&#8221;<br />
It mounted to its highest pitch.<br />
<br />
He a bewildered answer gave,<br />
Drowned in the sullen moaning wave,<br />
Lost in the echoes of the cave.<br />
<br />
He answered her he knew not what:<br />
Like shaft from bow at random shot,<br />
He spoke, but she regarded not.<br />
<br />
She waited not for his reply,<br />
But with a downward leaden eye<br />
Went on as if he were not by:<br />
<br />
Sound argument and grave defence,<br />
Strange questions raised on &#8220;Why?&#8221; and &#8220;Whence?&#8221;<br />
And wildly tangled evidence.<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_100" id="Page_100">[Pg 100]</a></span><br />
When he, with racked and whirling brain,<br />
Feebly implored her to explain,<br />
She simply said it all again.<br />
<br />
Wrenched with an agony intense,<br />
He spake, neglecting Sound and Sense,<br />
And careless of all consequence:<br />
<br />
&#8220;Mind&mdash;I believe&mdash;is Essence&mdash;Ent&mdash;<br />
Abstract&mdash;that is&mdash;an Accident&mdash;<br />
Which we&mdash;that is to say&mdash;I meant&mdash;&#8221;<br />
<br />
When, with quick breath and cheeks all flushed,<br />
At length his speech was somewhat hushed,<br />
She looked at him, and he was crushed.<br />
<br />
It needed not her calm reply:<br />
She fixed him with a stony eye,<br />
And he could neither fight nor fly,<br />
<br />
While she dissected, word by word,<br />
His speech, half guessed at and half heard,<br />
As might a cat a little bird.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_101" id="Page_101">[Pg 101]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i113.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;HE SPAKE, NEGLECTING SOUND AND SENSE.&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_102" id="Page_102">[Pg 102]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Then, having wholly overthrown<br />
His views, and stripped them to the bone,<br />
Proceeded to unfold her own.<br />
<br />
&#8220;Shall Man be Man? And shall he miss<br />
Of other thoughts no thought but this,<br />
Harmonious dews of sober bliss?<br />
<br />
&#8220;What boots it? Shall his fevered eye<br />
Through towering nothingness descry<br />
The grisly phantom hurry by?<br />
<br />
&#8220;And hear dumb shrieks that fill the air;<br />
See mouths that gape, and eyes that stare<br />
And redden in the dusky glare?<br />
<br />
&#8220;The meadows breathing amber light,<br />
The darkness toppling from the height,<br />
The feathery train of granite Night?<br />
<br />
&#8220;Shall he, grown gray among his peers,<br />
Through the thick curtain of his tears<br />
Catch glimpses of his earlier years,</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_103" id="Page_103">[Pg 103]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i115.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;SHALL MAN BE MAN?&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_104" id="Page_104">[Pg 104]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;And hear the sounds he knew of yore,<br />
Old shufflings on the sanded floor,<br />
Old knuckles tapping at the door?<br />
<br />
&#8220;Yet still before him as he flies<br />
One pallid form shall ever rise,<br />
And, bodying forth in glassy eyes<br />
<br />
&#8220;The vision of a vanished good,<br />
Low peering through the tangled wood,<br />
Shall freeze the current of his blood.&#8221;<br />
<br />
Still from each fact, with skill uncouth<br />
And savage rapture, like a tooth<br />
She wrenched some slow reluctant truth.<br />
<br />
Till, like a silent water-mill,<br />
When summer suns have dried the rill,<br />
She reached a full stop, and was still.<br />
<br />
Dead calm succeeded to the fuss,<br />
As when the loaded omnibus<br />
Has reached the railway terminus:<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_105" id="Page_105">[Pg 105]</a></span><br />
When, for the tumult of the street,<br />
Is heard the engine&#8217;s stifled beat,<br />
The velvet tread of porters&#8217; feet.<br />
<br />
With glance that ever sought the ground,<br />
She moved her lips without a sound,<br />
And every now and then she frowned.<br />
<br />
He gazed upon the sleeping sea,<br />
And joyed in its tranquillity,<br />
And in that silence dead, but she<br />
<br />
To muse a little space did seem,<br />
Then, like the echo of a dream,<br />
Harped back upon her threadbare theme.<br />
<br />
Still an attentive ear he lent<br />
But could not fathom what she meant:<br />
She was not deep, nor eloquent.<br />
<br />
He marked the ripple on the sand:<br />
The even swaying of her hand<br />
Was all that he could understand.<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_106" id="Page_106">[Pg 106]</a></span><br />
He saw in dreams a drawing-room,<br />
Where thirteen wretches sat in gloom,<br />
Waiting&mdash;he thought he knew for whom:<br />
<br />
He saw them drooping here and there,<br />
Each feebly huddled on a chair,<br />
In attitudes of blank despair:<br />
<br />
Oysters were not more mute than they,<br />
For all their brains were pumped away,<br />
And they had nothing more to say&mdash;<br />
<br />
Save one, who groaned &#8220;Three hours are gone!&#8221;<br />
Who shrieked &#8220;We&#8217;ll wait no longer, John!<br />
Tell them to set the dinner on!&#8221;<br />
<br />
The vision passed: the ghosts were fled:<br />
He saw once more that woman dread:<br />
He heard once more the words she said.<br />
<br />
He left her, and he turned aside:<br />
He sat and watched the coming tide<br />
Across the shores so newly dried.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_107" id="Page_107">[Pg 107]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i119.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;HE SAT AND WATCHED THE COMING TIDE&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_108" id="Page_108">[Pg 108]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>He wondered at the waters clear,<br />
The breeze that whispered in his ear,<br />
The billows heaving far and near,<br />
<br />
And why he had so long preferred<br />
To hang upon her every word:<br />
&#8220;In truth,&#8221; he said, &#8220;it was absurd.&#8221;</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i120.jpg" alt="" /></div>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_109" id="Page_109">[Pg 109]</a></span></p>
<h3>The Third Voice.</h3>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i121.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Not long this transport held its place:<br />
Within a little moment&#8217;s space<br />
Quick tears were raining down his face.<br />
<br />
His heart stood still, aghast with fear;<br />
A wordless voice, nor far nor near,<br />
He seemed to hear and not to hear.<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_110" id="Page_110">[Pg 110]</a></span><br />
&#8220;Tears kindle not the doubtful spark.<br />
If so, why not? Of this remark<br />
The bearings are profoundly dark.&#8221;<br />
<br />
&#8220;Her speech,&#8221; he said, &#8220;hath caused this pain.<br />
Easier I count it to explain<br />
The jargon of the howling main,<br />
<br />
&#8220;Or, stretched beside some babbling brook,<br />
To con, with inexpressive look,<br />
An unintelligible book.&#8221;<br />
<br />
Low spake the voice within his head,<br />
In words imagined more than said,<br />
Soundless as ghost&#8217;s intended tread:<br />
<br />
&#8220;If thou art duller than before,<br />
Why quittedst thou the voice of lore?<br />
Why not endure, expecting more?&#8221;<br />
<br />
&#8220;Rather than that,&#8221; he groaned aghast,<br />
&#8220;I&#8217;d writhe in depths of cavern vast,<br />
Some loathly vampire&#8217;s rich repast.&#8221;</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_111" id="Page_111">[Pg 111]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i123.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;HE GROANED AGHAST&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_112" id="Page_112">[Pg 112]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;&#8217;Twere hard,&#8221; it answered, &#8220;themes immense<br />
To coop within the narrow fence<br />
That rings <i>thy</i> scant intelligence.&#8221;<br />
<br />
&#8220;Not so,&#8221; he urged, &#8220;nor once alone:<br />
But there was something in her tone<br />
That chilled me to the very bone.<br />
<br />
&#8220;Her style was anything but clear,<br />
And most unpleasantly severe;<br />
Her epithets were very queer.<br />
<br />
&#8220;And yet, so grand were her replies,<br />
I could not choose but deem her wise;<br />
I did not dare to criticise;<br />
<br />
&#8220;Nor did I leave her, till she went<br />
So deep in tangled argument<br />
That all my powers of thought were spent.&#8221;<br />
<br />
A little whisper inly slid,<br />
&#8220;Yet truth is truth: you know you did.&#8221;<br />
A little wink beneath the lid.<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_113" id="Page_113">[Pg 113]</a></span><br />
And, sickened with excess of dread,<br />
Prone to the dust he bent his head,<br />
And lay like one three-quarters dead.<br />
<br />
The whisper left him&mdash;like a breeze<br />
Lost in the depths of leafy trees&mdash;<br />
Left him by no means at his ease.<br />
<br />
Once more he weltered in despair,<br />
With hands, through denser-matted hair,<br />
More tightly clenched than then they were.<br />
<br />
When, bathed in Dawn of living red,<br />
Majestic frowned the mountain head,<br />
&#8220;Tell me my fault,&#8221; was all he said.<br />
<br />
When, at high Noon, the blazing sky<br />
Scorched in his head each haggard eye,<br />
Then keenest rose his weary cry.<br />
<br />
And when at Eve the unpitying sun<br />
Smiled grimly on the solemn fun,<br />
&#8220;Alack,&#8221; he sighed, &#8220;what <i>have</i> I done?&#8221;</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_114" id="Page_114">[Pg 114]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i126.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;TORTURED, UNAIDED, AND ALONE&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_115" id="Page_115">[Pg 115]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>But saddest, darkest was the sight,<br />
When the cold grasp of leaden Night<br />
Dashed him to earth, and held him tight.<br />
<br />
Tortured, unaided, and alone,<br />
Thunders were silence to his groan,<br />
Bagpipes sweet music to its tone:<br />
<br />
&#8220;What? Ever thus, in dismal round,<br />
Shall Pain and Mystery profound<br />
Pursue me like a sleepless hound,<br />
<br />
&#8220;With crimson-dashed and eager jaws,<br />
Me, still in ignorance of the cause,<br />
Unknowing what I broke of laws?&#8221;<br />
<br />
The whisper to his ear did seem<br />
Like echoed flow of silent stream,<br />
Or shadow of forgotten dream,<br />
<br />
The whisper trembling in the wind:<br />
&#8220;Her fate with thine was intertwined,&#8221;<br />
So spake it in his inner mind:</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_116" id="Page_116">[Pg 116]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i128.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;A SCARED DULLARD, GIBBERING LOW&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_117" id="Page_117">[Pg 117]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;Each orbed on each a baleful star:<br />
Each proved the other&#8217;s blight and bar:<br />
Each unto each were best, most far:<br />
<br />
&#8220;Yea, each to each was worse than foe:<br />
Thou, a scared dullard, gibbering low,<br />
<span class="smcap">And she, an avalanche of woe</span>!&#8221;</td></tr></table>



<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_118" id="Page_118">[Pg 118]</a></span></p>
<h2>T&Egrave;MA CON VARIAZI&Oacute;NI.</h2>

<div class="note">
<p>[Why is it that Poetry has never yet been subjected to that process of
Dilution which has proved so advantageous to her sister-art Music? The
Diluter gives us first a few notes of some well-known Air, then a dozen
bars of his own, then a few more notes of the Air, and so on alternately:
thus saving the listener, if not from all risk of recognising the melody
at all, at least from the too-exciting transports which it might produce
in a more concentrated form. The process is termed &#8220;setting&#8221; by Composers,
and any one, that has ever experienced the emotion of being unexpectedly
set down in a heap of mortar, will recognise the truthfulness of this
happy phrase.</p>

<p>For truly, just as the genuine Epicure lingers lovingly over a morsel of
supreme Venison&mdash;whose every fibre seems to murmur &#8220;Excelsior!&#8221;&mdash;yet
swallows, ere returning to the toothsome dainty, great mouthfuls of
oatmeal-porridge and winkles: and just as the perfect Connoisseur in
Claret permits himself but one delicate sip, and then tosses off a pint or
more of boarding-school beer: so also&mdash;&mdash;</p></div>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_119" id="Page_119">[Pg 119]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>I never loved a dear Gazelle&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>Nor anything that cost me much:</i></span><br />
<i>High prices profit those who sell,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>But why should I be fond of such?</i></span><br />
<br />
To glad me with his soft black eye<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>My son comes trotting home from school;</i></span><br />
<i>He&#8217;s had a fight, but can&#8217;t tell why&mdash;</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>He always was a little fool!</i></span><br />
<br />
But, when he came to know me well,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>He kicked me out, her testy Sire:</i></span><br />
<i>And when I stained my hair, that Belle,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>Might note the change, and thus admire</i></span><br />
<br />
And love me, it was sure to dye<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>A muddy green or staring blue:</i></span><br />
<i>Whilst one might trace, with half an eye,</i><br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;"><i>The still triumphant carrot through</i>.</span></td></tr></table>



<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_120" id="Page_120">[Pg 120]</a></span></p>
<h2>A GAME OF FIVES.</h2>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i132.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Five little girls, of Five, Four, Three, Two, One:<br />
Rolling on the hearthrug, full of tricks and fun.<br />
<br />
Five rosy girls, in years from Ten to Six:<br />
Sitting down to lessons&mdash;no more time for tricks.<br />
<br />
Five growing girls, from Fifteen to Eleven:<br />
Music, Drawing, Languages, and food enough for seven!<br />
<br />
Five winsome girls, from Twenty to Sixteen:<br />
Each young man that calls, I say &#8220;Now tell me which you <i>mean</i>!&#8221;</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_121" id="Page_121">[Pg 121]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i133.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;NOW TELL ME WHICH YOU <i>MEAN</i>!&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_122" id="Page_122">[Pg 122]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Five dashing girls, the youngest Twenty-one:<br />
But, if nobody proposes, what is there to be done?<br />
<br />
Five showy girls&mdash;but Thirty is an age<br />
When girls may be <i>engaging</i>, but they somehow don&#8217;t <i>engage</i>.<br />
<br />
Five dressy girls, of Thirty-one or more:<br />
So gracious to the shy young men they snubbed so much before!<br />
<br /><span class="spacer">&nbsp;</span><span class="spacer">*</span><span class="spacer">*</span><span class="spacer">*</span><span class="spacer">*</span><span class="spacer">*</span><span class="spacer">*</span><br /><br />
Five <i>pass&eacute;</i> girls&mdash;Their age? Well, never mind!<br />
We jog along together, like the rest of human kind:<br />
But the quondam &#8220;careless bachelor&#8221; begins to think he knows<br />
The answer to that ancient problem &#8220;how the money goes&#8221;!</td></tr></table>



<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_123" id="Page_123">[Pg 123]</a></span></p>
<h2>POETA FIT, NON NASCITUR.</h2>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i135.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;How shall I be a poet?<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">How shall I write in rhyme?</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_124" id="Page_124">[Pg 124]</a></span>You told me once &#8216;the very wish<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Partook of the sublime.&#8217;</span><br />
Then tell me how! Don&#8217;t put me off<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With your &#8216;another time&#8217;!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The old man smiled to see him,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To hear his sudden sally;</span><br />
He liked the lad to speak his mind<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Enthusiastically;</span><br />
And thought &#8220;There&#8217;s no hum-drum in him,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Nor any shilly-shally.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And would you be a poet<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Before you&#8217;ve been to school?</span><br />
Ah, well! I hardly thought you<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So absolute a fool.</span><br />
First learn to be spasmodic&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A very simple rule.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;For first you write a sentence,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And then you chop it small;</span><br />
Then mix the bits, and sort them out<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Just as they chance to fall:</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_125" id="Page_125">[Pg 125]</a></span>The order of the phrases makes<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">No difference at all.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Then, if you&#8217;d be impressive,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Remember what I say,</span><br />
That abstract qualities begin<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With capitals alway:</span><br />
The True, the Good, the Beautiful&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Those are the things that pay!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Next, when you are describing<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A shape, or sound, or tint;</span><br />
Don&#8217;t state the matter plainly,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But put it in a hint;</span><br />
And learn to look at all things<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With a sort of mental squint.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;For instance, if I wished, Sir,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of mutton-pies to tell,</span><br />
Should I say &#8216;dreams of fleecy flocks<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Pent in a wheaten cell&#8217;?&#8221;</span><br />
&#8220;Why, yes,&#8221; the old man said: &#8220;that phrase<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Would answer very well.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_126" id="Page_126">[Pg 126]</a></span><br />
&#8220;Then fourthly, there are epithets<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That suit with any word&mdash;</span><br />
As well as Harvey&#8217;s Reading Sauce<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With fish, or flesh, or bird&mdash;</span><br />
Of these, &#8216;wild,&#8217; &#8216;lonely,&#8217; &#8216;weary,&#8217; &#8216;strange,&#8217;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Are much to be preferred.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And will it do, O will it do<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To take them in a lump&mdash;</span><br />
As &#8216;the wild man went his weary way<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To a strange and lonely pump&#8217;?&#8221;</span><br />
&#8220;Nay, nay! You must not hastily<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To such conclusions jump.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Such epithets, like pepper,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Give zest to what you write;</span><br />
And, if you strew them sparely,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They whet the appetite:</span><br />
But if you lay them on too thick,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You spoil the matter quite!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_127" id="Page_127">[Pg 127]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i139.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;THE WILD MAN WENT HIS WEARY WAY&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_128" id="Page_128">[Pg 128]</a></span></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;Last, as to the arrangement:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Your reader, you should show him,</span><br />
Must take what information he<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Can get, and look for no im-</span><br />
mature disclosure of the drift<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And purpose of your poem.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Therefore, to test his patience&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">How much he can endure&mdash;</span><br />
Mention no places, names, or dates,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And evermore be sure</span><br />
Throughout the poem to be found<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Consistently obscure.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;First fix upon the limit<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To which it shall extend:</span><br />
Then fill it up with &#8216;Padding&#8217;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Beg some of any friend):</span><br />
Your great <span class="smcap">Sensation-stanza</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You place towards the end.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And what is a Sensation,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Grandfather, tell me, pray?</span><br />
I think I never heard the word<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So used before to-day:</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_129" id="Page_129">[Pg 129]</a></span>Be kind enough to mention one<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8216;<i>Exempli grati&acirc;</i>.&#8217;&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
And the old man, looking sadly<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Across the garden-lawn,</span><br />
Where here and there a dew-drop<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Yet glittered in the dawn,</span><br />
Said &#8220;Go to the Adelphi,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And see the &#8216;Colleen Bawn.&#8217;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The word is due to Boucicault&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The theory is his,</span><br />
Where Life becomes a Spasm,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And History a Whiz:</span><br />
If that is not Sensation,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I don&#8217;t know what it is.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Now try your hand, ere Fancy<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Have lost its present glow&mdash;&#8221;</span><br />
&#8220;And then,&#8221; his grandson added,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;We&#8217;ll publish it, you know:</span><br />
Green cloth&mdash;gold-lettered at the back&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In duodecimo!&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_130" id="Page_130">[Pg 130]</a></span><br />
Then proudly smiled that old man<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To see the eager lad</span><br />
Rush madly for his pen and ink<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And for his blotting-pad&mdash;</span><br />
But, when he thought of <i>publishing</i>,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">His face grew stern and sad.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i142.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_131" id="Page_131">[Pg 131]</a></span></p>
<h2>THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK,</h2>
<h3>An Agony in Eight Fits.</h3>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="note">
<p class="center">PREFACE.</p>

<p>If&mdash;and the thing is wildly possible&mdash;the charge of writing nonsense were
ever brought against the author of this brief but instructive poem, it
would be based, I feel convinced, on the line (in p. 144)</p>

<p class="poem">&#8220;Then the bowsprit got mixed with the rudder sometimes:&#8221;</p>

<p>In view of this painful possibility, I will not (as I might) appeal
indignantly to my other writings as a proof that I am incapable of such a
deed: I will not (as I might) point to the strong moral purpose of this
poem itself, to the arithmetical principles so cautiously inculcated in
it, or to its noble teachings in Natural History&mdash;I will take the more
prosaic course of simply explaining how it happened.</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_132" id="Page_132">[Pg 132]</a></span>The Bellman, who was almost morbidly sensitive about appearances, used to
have the bowsprit unshipped once or twice a week to be revarnished; and it
more than once happened, when the time came for replacing it, that no one
on board could remember which end of the ship it belonged to. They knew it
was not of the slightest use to appeal to the Bellman about it&mdash;he would
only refer to his Naval Code, and read out in pathetic tones Admiralty
Instructions which none of them had ever been able to understand&mdash;so it
generally ended in its being fastened on, anyhow, across the rudder. The
helmsman<small><a name="f1.1" id="f1.1" href="#f1">[1]</a></small> used to stand by with tears in his eyes: <i>he</i> knew it was all
wrong, but alas! Rule 42 of the Code, &#8220;<i>No one shall speak to the Man at
the Helm</i>,&#8221; had been completed by the Bellman himself with the words &#8220;<i>and
the Man at the Helm shall speak to no one</i>.&#8221; So remonstrance was
impossible, and no steering could be done till the next varnishing day.
During these bewildering intervals the ship usually sailed backwards.</p>

<p>As this poem is to some extent connected with the lay of the Jabberwock,
let me take this opportunity of answering a question that has often been
asked me, how to pronounce &#8220;slithy toves.&#8221; The &#8220;i&#8221; in &#8220;slithy&#8221; is long, as
in &#8220;writhe&#8221;; and &#8220;toves&#8221; is pronounced so as to rhyme with &#8220;groves.&#8221;
Again, the first &#8220;o&#8221; in &#8220;borogoves&#8221; is pronounced like the &#8220;o&#8221; in
&#8220;borrow.&#8221; I have heard people try to give it the sound of the &#8220;o&#8221; in
&#8220;worry.&#8221; Such is Human Perversity.</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_133" id="Page_133">[Pg 133]</a></span>This also seems a fitting occasion to notice the other hard words in that
poem. Humpty-Dumpty&#8217;s theory, of two meanings packed into one word like a
portmanteau, seems to me the right explanation for all.</p>

<p>For instance, take the two words &#8220;fuming&#8221; and &#8220;furious.&#8221; Make up your mind
that you will say both words, but leave it unsettled which you will say
first. Now open your mouth and speak. If your thoughts incline ever so
little towards &#8220;fuming,&#8221; you will say &#8220;fuming-furious&#8221;; if they turn, by
even a hair&#8217;s breadth towards &#8220;furious,&#8221; you will say &#8220;furious-fuming&#8221;;
but if you have that rarest of gifts, a perfectly balanced mind, you will
say &#8220;frumious.&#8221;</p>

<p>Supposing that, when Pistol uttered the well-known words&mdash;</p>

<p class="poem">&#8220;Under which king, Bezonian? Speak or die!&#8221;</p>

<p>Justice Shallow had felt certain that it was either William or Richard,
but had not been able to settle which, so that he could not possibly say
either name before the other, can it be doubted that, rather than die, he
would have gasped out &#8220;Rilchiam!&#8221;</p></div>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_134" id="Page_134">[Pg 134]</a></span></p>
<h3>Fit the First.</h3>
<p class="center"><i>THE LANDING.</i></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;Just the place for a Snark!&#8221; the Bellman cried,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As he landed his crew with care;</span><br />
Supporting each man on the top of the tide<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By a finger entwined in his hair.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Just the place for a Snark! I have said it twice:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That alone should encourage the crew.</span><br />
Just the place for a Snark! I have said it thrice:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">What I tell you three times is true.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The crew was complete: it included a Boots&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A maker of Bonnets and Hoods&mdash;</span><br />
A Barrister, brought to arrange their disputes&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And a Broker, to value their goods.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_135" id="Page_135">[Pg 135]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i147.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;SUPPORTING EACH MAN ON THE TOP OF THE TIDE&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_136" id="Page_136">[Pg 136]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>A Billiard-marker, whose skill was immense,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Might perhaps have won more than his share&mdash;</span><br />
But a Banker, engaged at enormous expense,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Had the whole of their cash in his care.</span><br />
<br />
There was also a Beaver, that paced on the deck,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or would sit making lace in the bow:</span><br />
And had often (the Bellman said) saved them from wreck,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Though none of the sailors knew how.</span><br />
<br />
There was one who was famed for the number of things<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He forgot when he entered the ship:</span><br />
His umbrella, his watch, all his jewels and rings,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the clothes he had bought for the trip.</span><br />
<br />
He had forty-two boxes, all carefully packed,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With his name painted clearly on each:</span><br />
But since he omitted to mention the fact,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They were all left behind on the beach.</span><br />
<br />
The loss of his clothes hardly mattered, because<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He had seven coats on when he came,</span><br />
With three pair of boots&mdash;but the worst of it was<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He had wholly forgotten his name.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_137" id="Page_137">[Pg 137]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i149.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;HE HAD WHOLLY FORGOTTEN HIS NAME&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_138" id="Page_138">[Pg 138]</a></span></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>He would answer to &#8220;Hi!&#8221; or to any loud cry,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Such as &#8220;Fry me!&#8221; or &#8220;Fritter my wig!&#8221;</span><br />
To &#8220;What-you-may-call-um!&#8221; or &#8220;What-was-his-name!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But especially &#8220;Thing-um-a jig!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
While, for those who preferred a more forcible word,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He had different names from these:</span><br />
His intimate friends called him &#8220;Candle-ends,&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And his enemies &#8220;Toasted-cheese.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;His form is ungainly&mdash;his intellect small&mdash;&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(So the Bellman would often remark)&mdash;</span><br />
&#8220;But his courage is perfect! And that, after all,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Is the thing that one needs with a Snark.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
He would joke with hy&aelig;nas, returning their stare<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With an impudent wag of the head:</span><br />
And he once went a walk, paw-in-paw, with a bear,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Just to keep up its spirits,&#8221; he said.</span><br />
<br />
He came as a Baker: but owned, when too late&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And it drove the poor Bellman half-mad&mdash;</span><br />
He could only bake Bride-cake&mdash;for which, I may state,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">No materials were to be had.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_139" id="Page_139">[Pg 139]</a></span><br />
The last of the crew needs especial remark,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Though he looked an incredible dunce:</span><br />
He had just one idea&mdash;but, that one being &#8220;Snark,&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The good Bellman engaged him at once.</span><br />
<br />
He came as a Butcher: but gravely declared,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When the ship had been sailing a week,</span><br />
He could only kill Beavers. The Bellman looked scared,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And was almost too frightened to speak:</span><br />
<br />
But at length he explained, in a tremulous tone,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">There was only one Beaver on board;</span><br />
And that was a tame one he had of his own,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Whose death would be deeply deplored.</span><br />
<br />
The Beaver, who happened to hear the remark,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Protested, with tears in its eyes,</span><br />
That not even the rapture of hunting the Snark<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Could atone for that dismal surprise!</span><br />
<br />
It strongly advised that the Butcher should be<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Conveyed in a separate ship:</span><br />
But the Bellman declared that would never agree<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With the plans he had made for the trip:</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_140" id="Page_140">[Pg 140]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i152.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;THE BEAVER KEPT LOOKING THE OPPOSITE WAY&#8221;</small></p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_141" id="Page_141">[Pg 141]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Navigation was always a difficult art,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Though with only one ship and one bell:</span><br />
And he feared he must really decline, for his part,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Undertaking another as well.</span><br />
<br />
The Beaver&#8217;s best course was, no doubt, to procure<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A second-hand dagger-proof coat&mdash;</span><br />
So the Baker advised it&mdash;and next, to insure<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Its life in some Office of note:</span><br />
<br />
This the Banker suggested, and offered for hire<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(On moderate terms), or for sale,</span><br />
Two excellent Policies, one Against Fire,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And one Against Damage From Hail.</span><br />
<br />
Yet still, ever after that sorrowful day,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Whenever the Butcher was by,</span><br />
The Beaver kept looking the opposite way,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And appeared unaccountably shy.</span></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_142" id="Page_142">[Pg 142]</a></span></p>

<h3>Fit the Second.</h3>
<p class="center"><i>THE BELLMAN&#8217;S SPEECH.</i></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>The Bellman himself they all praised to the skies&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Such a carriage, such ease and such grace!</span><br />
Such solemnity, too! One could see he was wise,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The moment one looked in his face!</span><br />
<br />
He had bought a large map representing the sea,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Without the least vestige of land:</span><br />
And the crew were much pleased when they found it to be<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A map they could all understand.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;What&#8217;s the good of Mercator&#8217;s North Poles and Equators,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Tropics, Zones, and Meridian Lines?&#8221;</span><br />
So the Bellman would cry: and the crew would reply<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;They are merely conventional signs!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_143" id="Page_143">[Pg 143]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i155.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>OCEAN-CHART.</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_144" id="Page_144">[Pg 144]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;Other maps are such shapes, with their islands and capes!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But we&#8217;ve got our brave Captain to thank&#8221;</span><br />
(So the crew would protest) &#8220;that he&#8217;s bought <i>us</i> the best&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A perfect and absolute blank!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
This was charming, no doubt: but they shortly found out<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That the Captain they trusted so well</span><br />
Had only one notion for crossing the ocean,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And that was to tingle his bell.</span><br />
<br />
He was thoughtful and grave&mdash;but the orders he gave<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Were enough to bewilder a crew.</span><br />
When he cried &#8220;Steer to starboard, but keep her head larboard!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">What on earth was the helmsman to do?</span><br />
<br />
Then the bowsprit got mixed with the rudder sometimes:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A thing, as the Bellman remarked,</span><br />
That frequently happens in tropical climes,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When a vessel is, so to speak, &#8220;snarked.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
But the principal failing occurred in the sailing,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the Bellman, perplexed and distressed,</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_145" id="Page_145">[Pg 145]</a></span>Said he <i>had</i> hoped, at least, when the wind blew due East,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That the ship would <i>not</i> travel due West!</span><br />
<br />
But the danger was past&mdash;they had landed at last,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With their boxes, portmanteaus, and bags:</span><br />
Yet at first sight the crew were not pleased with the view<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Which consisted of chasms and crags.</span><br />
<br />
The Bellman perceived that their spirits were low,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And repeated in musical tone</span><br />
Some jokes he had kept for a season of woe&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But the crew would do nothing but groan.</span><br />
<br />
He served out some grog with a liberal hand,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And bade them sit down on the beach:</span><br />
And they could not but own that their Captain looked grand,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As he stood and delivered his speech.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Friends, Romans, and countrymen, lend me your ears!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(They were all of them fond of quotations:</span><br />
So they drank to his health, and they gave him three cheers<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">While he served out additional rations).</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_146" id="Page_146">[Pg 146]</a></span><br />
&#8220;We have sailed many months, we have sailed many weeks,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Four weeks to the month you may mark),</span><br />
But never as yet (&#8217;tis your Captain who speaks)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Have we caught the least glimpse of a Snark!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;We have sailed many weeks, we have sailed many days,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Seven days to the week I allow),</span><br />
But a Snark, on the which we might lovingly gaze,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">We have never beheld till now!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Come, listen, my men, while I tell you again<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The five unmistakable marks</span><br />
By which you may know, wheresoever you go,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The warranted genuine Snarks.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Let us take them in order. The first is the taste,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Which is meagre and hollow, but crisp:</span><br />
Like a coat that is rather too tight in the waist,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With a flavour of Will-o-the wisp.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Its habit of getting up late you&#8217;ll agree<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That it carries too far, when I say</span><br />
That it frequently breakfasts at five o&#8217;clock tea,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And dines on the following day.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_147" id="Page_147">[Pg 147]</a></span><br />
&#8220;The third is its slowness in taking a jest.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Should you happen to venture on one,</span><br />
It will sigh like a thing that is deeply distressed:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And it always looks grave at a pun.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The fourth is its fondness for bathing-machines,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Which it constantly carries about,</span><br />
And believes that they add to the beauty of scenes&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A sentiment open to doubt.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The fifth is ambition. It next will be right<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To describe each particular batch:</span><br />
Distinguishing those that have feathers, and bite,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From those that have whiskers, and scratch.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;For, although common Snarks do no manner of harm,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Yet I feel it my duty to say</span><br />
Some are Boojums&mdash;&#8221; The Bellman broke off in alarm,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For the Baker had fainted away.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_148" id="Page_148">[Pg 148]</a></span></p>
<h3>Fit the Third.</h3>
<p class="center"><i>THE BAKER&#8217;S TALE.</i></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>They roused him with muffins&mdash;they roused him with ice&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They roused him with mustard and cress&mdash;</span><br />
They roused him with jam and judicious advice&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They set him conundrums to guess.</span><br />
<br />
When at length he sat up and was able to speak,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">His sad story he offered to tell;</span><br />
And the Bellman cried &#8220;Silence! Not even a shriek!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And excitedly tingled his bell.</span><br />
<br />
There was silence supreme! Not a shriek, not a scream;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Scarcely even a howl or a groan,</span><br />
As the man they called &#8220;Ho!&#8221; told his story of woe<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In an antediluvian tone.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_149" id="Page_149">[Pg 149]</a></span><br />
&#8220;My father and mother were honest, though poor&mdash;&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Skip all that!&#8221; cried the Bellman in haste.</span><br />
&#8220;If it once becomes dark, there&#8217;s no chance of a Snark&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">We have hardly a minute to waste!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;I skip forty years,&#8221; said the Baker, in tears,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;And proceed without further remark</span><br />
To the day when you took me aboard of your ship<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To help you in hunting the Snark.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;A dear uncle of mine (after whom I was named)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Remarked, when I bade him farewell&mdash;&#8221;</span><br />
&#8220;Oh, skip your dear uncle!&#8221; the Bellman exclaimed,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As he angrily tingled his bell.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;He remarked to me then,&#8221; said that mildest of men,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;&#8216;If your Snark be a Snark, that is right:</span><br />
Fetch it home by all means&mdash;you may serve it with greens<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And it&#8217;s handy for striking a light.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;&#8216;You may seek it with thimbles&mdash;and seek it with care;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You may hunt it with forks and hope;</span><br />
You may threaten its life with a railway-share;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You may charm it with smiles and soap&mdash;&#8217;&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_150" id="Page_150">[Pg 150]</a></span><br />
(&#8220;That&#8217;s exactly the method,&#8221; the Bellman bold<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In a hasty parenthesis cried,</span><br />
&#8220;That&#8217;s exactly the way I have always been told<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That the capture of Snarks should be tried!&#8221;)</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;&#8216;But oh, beamish nephew, beware of the day,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">If your Snark be a Boojum! For then</span><br />
You will softly and suddenly vanish away,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And never be met with again!&#8217;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;It is this, it is this that oppresses my soul,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When I think of my uncle&#8217;s last words:</span><br />
And my heart is like nothing so much as a bowl<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Brimming over with quivering curds!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;It is this, it is this&mdash;&#8221; &#8220;We have had that before!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The Bellman indignantly said.</span><br />
And the Baker replied &#8220;Let me say it once more.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It is this, it is this that I dread!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;I engage with the Snark&mdash;every night after dark&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In a dreamy delirious fight:</span><br />
I serve it with greens in those shadowy scenes,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And I use it for striking a light:</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_151" id="Page_151">[Pg 151]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i163.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;BUT OH, BEAMISH NEPHEW, BEWARE OF THE DAY&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_152" id="Page_152">[Pg 152]</a></span></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;But if ever I meet with a Boojum, that day,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In a moment (of this I am sure),</span><br />
I shall softly and suddenly vanish away&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the notion I cannot endure!&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_153" id="Page_153">[Pg 153]</a></span></p>
<h3>Fit the Fourth.</h3>
<p class="center"><i>THE HUNTING.</i></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>
The Bellman looked uffish, and wrinkled his brow.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;If only you&#8217;d spoken before!</span><br />
It&#8217;s excessively awkward to mention it now,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With the Snark, so to speak, at the door!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;We should all of us grieve, as you well may believe,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">If you never were met with again&mdash;</span><br />
But surely, my man, when the voyage began,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You might have suggested it then?</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;It&#8217;s excessively awkward to mention it now&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As I think I&#8217;ve already remarked.&#8221;</span><br />
And the man they called &#8220;Hi!&#8221; replied, with a sigh,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;I informed you the day we embarked.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_154" id="Page_154">[Pg 154]</a></span><br />
&#8220;You may charge me with murder&mdash;or want of sense&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(We are all of us weak at times):</span><br />
But the slightest approach to a false pretence<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Was never among my crimes!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;I said it in Hebrew&mdash;I said it in Dutch&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I said it in German and Greek:</span><br />
But I wholly forgot (and it vexes me much)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That English is what you speak!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;&#8217;Tis a pitiful tale,&#8221; said the Bellman, whose face<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Had grown longer at every word:</span><br />
&#8220;But, now that you&#8217;ve stated the whole of your case,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">More debate would be simply absurd.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The rest of my speech&#8221; (he explained to his men)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;You shall hear when I&#8217;ve leisure to speak it.</span><br />
But the Snark is at hand, let me tell you again!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8217;Tis your glorious duty to seek it!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;To seek it with thimbles, to seek it with care;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To pursue it with forks and hope;</span><br />
To threaten its life with a railway-share;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To charm it with smiles and soap!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_155" id="Page_155">[Pg 155]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i167.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;TO PURSUE IT WITH FORKS AND HOPE.&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>


<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_156" id="Page_156">[Pg 156]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;For the Snark&#821#8217;s a peculiar creature, that won&#8217;t<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Be caught in a commonplace way.</span><br />
Do all that you know, and try all that you don&#8217;t:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Not a chance must be wasted to-day!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;For England expects&mdash;I forbear to proceed:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8217;Tis a maxim tremendous, but trite:</span><br />
And you&#8217;d best be unpacking the things that you need<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To rig yourselves out for the fight.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Then the Banker endorsed a blank cheque (which he crossed),<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And changed his loose silver for notes:</span><br />
The Baker with care combed his whiskers and hair,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And shook the dust out of his coats:</span><br />
<br />
The Boots and the Broker were sharpening a spade&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Each working the grindstone in turn:</span><br />
But the Beaver went on making lace, and displayed<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">No interest in the concern:</span><br />
<br />
Though the Barrister tried to appeal to its pride,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And vainly proceeded to cite</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_157" id="Page_157">[Pg 157]</a></span>A number of cases, in which making laces<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Had been proved an infringement of right.</span><br />
<br />
The maker of Bonnets ferociously planned<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A novel arrangement of bows:</span><br />
While the Billiard-marker with quivering hand<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Was chalking the tip of his nose.</span><br />
<br />
But the Butcher turned nervous, and dressed himself fine,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With yellow kid gloves and a ruff&mdash;</span><br />
Said he felt it exactly like going to dine,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Which the Bellman declared was all &#8220;stuff.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Introduce me, now there&#8217;s a good fellow,&#8221; he said,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;If we happen to meet it together!&#8221;</span><br />
And the Bellman, sagaciously nodding his head,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Said &#8220;That must depend on the weather.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The Beaver went simply galumphing about,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">At seeing the Butcher so shy:</span><br />
And even the Baker, though stupid and stout,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Made an effort to wink with one eye.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_158" id="Page_158">[Pg 158]</a></span><br />
&#8220;Be a man!&#8221; cried the Bellman in wrath, as he heard<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The Butcher beginning to sob.</span><br />
&#8220;Should we meet with a Jubjub, that desperate bird,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">We shall need all our strength for the job!&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_159" id="Page_159">[Pg 159]</a></span></p>
<h3>Fit the Fifth.</h3>
<p class="center"><i>THE BEAVER&#8217;S LESSON.</i></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They pursued it with forks and hope;</span><br />
They threatened its life with a railway-share;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They charmed it with smiles and soap.</span><br />
<br />
Then the Butcher contrived an ingenious plan<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For making a separate sally;</span><br />
And had fixed on a spot unfrequented by man,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A dismal and desolate valley.</span><br />
<br />
But the very same plan to the Beaver occurred:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It had chosen the very same place:</span><br />
Yet neither betrayed, by a sign or a word,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The disgust that appeared in his face.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_160" id="Page_160">[Pg 160]</a></span><br />
Each thought he was thinking of nothing but &#8220;Snark&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the glorious work of the day;</span><br />
And each tried to pretend that he did not remark<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That the other was going that way.</span><br />
<br />
But the valley grew narrow and narrower still,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the evening got darker and colder,</span><br />
Till (merely from nervousness, not from good will)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They marched along shoulder to shoulder.</span><br />
<br />
Then a scream, shrill and high, rent the shuddering sky,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And they knew that some danger was near:</span><br />
The Beaver turned pale to the tip of its tail,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And even the Butcher felt queer.</span><br />
<br />
He thought of his childhood, left far far behind&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That blissful and innocent state&mdash;</span><br />
The sound so exactly recalled to his mind<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A pencil that squeaks on a slate!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;&#8217;Tis the voice of the Jubjub!&#8221; he suddenly cried.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(This man, that they used to call &#8220;Dunce.&#8221;)</span><br />
&#8220;As the Bellman would tell you,&#8221; he added with pride,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;I have uttered that sentiment once.&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_161" id="Page_161">[Pg 161]</a></span><br />
&#8220;&#8217;Tis the note of the Jubjub! Keep count, I entreat;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You will find I have told it you twice.</span><br />
&#8217;Tis the song of the Jubjub! The proof is complete,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">If only I&#8217;ve stated it thrice.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The Beaver had counted with scrupulous care,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Attending to every word:</span><br />
But it fairly lost heart, and outgrabe in despair,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When the third repetition occurred.</span><br />
<br />
It felt that, in spite of all possible pains,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It had somehow contrived to lose count,</span><br />
And the only thing now was to rack its poor brains<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By reckoning up the amount.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Two added to one&mdash;if that could but be done,&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It said, &#8220;with one&#8217;s fingers and thumbs!&#8221;</span><br />
Recollecting with tears how, in earlier years,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It had taken no pains with its sums.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The thing can be done,&#8221; said the Butcher, &#8220;I think.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The thing must be done, I am sure.</span><br />
The thing shall be done! Bring me paper and ink,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The best there is time to procure.&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_162" id="Page_162">[Pg 162]</a></span><br />
The Beaver brought paper, portfolio, pens,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And ink in unfailing supplies:</span><br />
While strange creepy creatures came out of their dens,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And watched them with wondering eyes.</span><br />
<br />
So engrossed was the Butcher, he heeded them not,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As he wrote with a pen in each hand,</span><br />
And explained all the while in a popular style<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Which the Beaver could well understand.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Taking Three as the subject to reason about&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A convenient number to state&mdash;</span><br />
We add Seven, and Ten, and then multiply out<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By One Thousand diminished by Eight.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The result we proceed to divide, as you see,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By Nine-Hundred-and-Ninety-and-Two:</span><br />
Then subtract Seventeen, and the answer must be<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Exactly and perfectly true.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The method employed I would gladly explain,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">While I have it so clear in my head,</span><br />
If I had but the time and you had but the brain&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But much yet remains to be said.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_163" id="Page_163">[Pg 163]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i175.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;THE BEAVER BROUGHT PAPER, PORTFOLIO, PENS&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_164" id="Page_164">[Pg 164]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;In one moment I&#8217;ve seen what has hitherto been<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Enveloped in absolute mystery,</span><br />
And without extra charge I will give you at large<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A Lesson in Natural History.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
In his genial way he proceeded to say<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Forgetting all laws of propriety,</span><br />
And that giving instruction, without introduction,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Would have caused quite a thrill in Society),</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;As to temper the Jubjub&#8217;s a desperate bird,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Since it lives in perpetual passion:</span><br />
Its taste in costume is entirely absurd&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It is ages ahead of the fashion:</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;But it knows any friend it has met once before:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It never will look at a bribe:</span><br />
And in charity-meetings it stands at the door,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And collects&mdash;though it does not subscribe.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Its flavour when cooked is more exquisite far<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Than mutton, or oysters, or eggs:</span><br />
(Some think it keeps best in an ivory jar,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And some, in mahogany kegs:)</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_165" id="Page_165">[Pg 165]</a></span><br />
&#8220;You boil it in sawdust: you salt it in glue:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You condense it with locusts and tape:</span><br />
Still keeping one principal object in view&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To preserve its symmetrical shape.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The Butcher would gladly have talked till next day,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But he felt that the Lesson must end,</span><br />
And he wept with delight in attempting to say<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He considered the Beaver his friend:</span><br />
<br />
While the Beaver confessed, with affectionate looks<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">More eloquent even than tears,</span><br />
It had learned in ten minutes far more than all books<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Would have taught it in seventy years.</span><br />
<br />
They returned hand-in-hand, and the Bellman, unmanned<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(For a moment) with noble emotion,</span><br />
Said &#8220;This amply repays all the wearisome days<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">We have spent on the billowy ocean!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Such friends, as the Beaver and Butcher became,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Have seldom if ever been known;</span><br />
In winter or summer, &#8217;twas always the same&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">You could never meet either alone.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_166" id="Page_166">[Pg 166]</a></span><br />
And when quarrels arose&mdash;as one frequently finds<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Quarrels will, spite of every endeavour&mdash;</span><br />
The song of the Jubjub recurred to their minds,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And cemented their friendship for ever!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_167" id="Page_167">[Pg 167]</a></span></p>
<h3>Fit the Sixth.</h3>
<p class="center"><i>THE BARRISTER&#8217;S DREAM.</i></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They pursued it with forks and hope;</span><br />
They threatened its life with a railway-share;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They charmed it with smiles and soap.</span><br />
<br />
But the Barrister, weary of proving in vain<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That the Beaver&#8217;s lace-making was wrong,</span><br />
Fell asleep, and in dreams saw the creature quite plain<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That his fancy had dwelt on so long.</span><br />
<br />
He dreamed that he stood in a shadowy Court,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Where the Snark, with a glass in its eye,</span><br />
Dressed in gown, bands, and wig, was defending a pig<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">On the charge of deserting its sty.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_168" id="Page_168">[Pg 168]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i180.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;&#8216;YOU MUST KNOW&mdash;&#8217; SAID THE JUDGE: BUT THE SNARK EXCLAIMED &#8216;FUDGE!&#8217;&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_169" id="Page_169">[Pg 169]</a></span></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>The Witnesses proved, without error or flaw,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That the sty was deserted when found:</span><br />
And the Judge kept explaining the state of the law<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In a soft under-current of sound.</span><br />
<br />
The indictment had never been clearly expressed,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And it seemed that the Snark had begun,</span><br />
And had spoken three hours, before any one guessed<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">What the pig was supposed to have done.</span><br />
<br />
The Jury had each formed a different view<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Long before the indictment was read),</span><br />
And they all spoke at once, so that none of them knew<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">One word that the others had said.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;You must know&mdash;&#8221; said the Judge: but the Snark exclaimed &#8220;Fudge!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That statute is obsolete quite!</span><br />
Let me tell you, my friends, the whole question depends<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">On an ancient manorial right.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;In the matter of Treason the pig would appear<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To have aided, but scarcely abetted:</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_170" id="Page_170">[Pg 170]</a></span>While the charge of Insolvency fails, it is clear,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">If you grant the plea &#8216;never indebted.&#8217;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;The fact of Desertion I will not dispute:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But its guilt, as I trust, is removed</span><br />
(So far as relates to the costs of this suit)<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By the Alibi which has been proved.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;My poor client&#8217;s fate now depends on your votes.&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Here the speaker sat down in his place,</span><br />
And directed the Judge to refer to his notes<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And briefly to sum up the case.</span><br />
<br />
But the Judge said he never had summed up before;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So the Snark undertook it instead,</span><br />
And summed it so well that it came to far more<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Than the Witnesses ever had said!</span><br />
<br />
When the verdict was called for, the Jury declined,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As the word was so puzzling to spell;</span><br />
But they ventured to hope that the Snark wouldn&#8217;t mind<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Undertaking that duty as well.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_171" id="Page_171">[Pg 171]</a></span><br />
So the Snark found the verdict, although, as it owned,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It was spent with the toils of the day:</span><br />
When it said the word &#8220;GUILTY!&#8221; the Jury all groaned<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And some of them fainted away.</span><br />
<br />
Then the Snark pronounced sentence, the Judge being quite<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Too nervous to utter a word:</span><br />
When it rose to its feet, there was silence like night,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the fall of a pin might be heard.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Transportation for life&#8221; was the sentence it gave,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;And <i>then</i> to be fined forty pound.&#8221;</span><br />
The Jury all cheered, though the Judge said he feared<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That the phrase was not legally sound.</span><br />
<br />
But their wild exultation was suddenly checked<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">When the jailer informed them, with tears,</span><br />
Such a sentence would have not the slightest effect,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">As the pig had been dead for some years.</span><br />
<br />
The Judge left the Court, looking deeply disgusted:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">But the Snark, though a little aghast,</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_172" id="Page_172">[Pg 172]</a></span>As the lawyer to whom the defence was intrusted,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Went bellowing on to the last.</span><br />
<br />
Thus the Barrister dreamed, while the bellowing seemed<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To grow every moment more clear:</span><br />
Till he woke to the knell of a furious bell,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Which the Bellman rang close at his ear.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_173" id="Page_173">[Pg 173]</a></span></p>
<h3>Fit the Seventh.</h3>
<p class="center"><i>THE BANKER&#8217;S FATE.</i></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They pursued it with forks and hope;</span><br />
They threatened its life with a railway-share;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They charmed it with smiles and soap.</span><br />
<br />
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It was matter for general remark,</span><br />
Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In his zeal to discover the Snark.</span><br />
<br />
But while he was seeking with thimbles and care,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A Bandersnatch swiftly drew nigh</span><br />
And grabbed at the Banker, who shrieked in despair,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For he knew it was useless to fly.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_174" id="Page_174">[Pg 174]</a></span><br />
He offered large discount&mdash;he offered a cheque<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(Drawn &#8220;to bearer&#8221;) for seven-pounds-ten:</span><br />
But the Bandersnatch merely extended its neck<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And grabbed at the Banker again.</span><br />
<br />
Without rest or pause&mdash;while those frumious jaws<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Went savagely snapping around&mdash;</span><br />
He skipped and he hopped, and he floundered and flopped,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Till fainting he fell to the ground.</span><br />
<br />
The Bandersnatch fled as the others appeared<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Led on by that fear-stricken yell:</span><br />
And the Bellman remarked &#8220;It is just as I feared!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And solemnly tolled on his bell.</span><br />
<br />
He was black in the face, and they scarcely could trace<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The least likeness to what he had been:</span><br />
While so great was his fright that his waistcoat turned white&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A wonderful thing to be seen!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_175" id="Page_175">[Pg 175]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i187.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;SO GREAT WAS HIS FRIGHT THAT HIS WAISTCOAT TURNED WHITE.&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_176" id="Page_176">[Pg 176]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>To the horror of all who were present that day,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He uprose in full evening dress,</span><br />
And with senseless grimaces endeavoured to say<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">What his tongue could no longer express.</span><br />
<br />
Down he sank in a chair&mdash;ran his hands through his hair&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And chanted in mimsiest tones</span><br />
Words whose utter inanity proved his insanity,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">While he rattled a couple of bones.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Leave him here to his fate&mdash;it is getting so late!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The Bellman exclaimed in a fright.</span><br />
&#8220;We have lost half the day. Any further delay,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And we sha&#8217;n&#8217;t catch a Snark before night!&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_177" id="Page_177">[Pg 177]</a></span></p>
<h3>Fit the Eighth.</h3>
<p class="center"><i>THE VANISHING.</i></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They pursued it with forks and hope;</span><br />
They threatened its life with a railway-share;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They charmed it with smiles and soap.</span><br />
<br />
They shuddered to think that the chase might fail,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the Beaver, excited at last,</span><br />
Went bounding along on the tip of its tail,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For the daylight was nearly past.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;There is Thingumbob shouting!&#8221; the Bellman said.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;He is shouting like mad, only hark!</span><br />
He is waving his hands, he is wagging his head,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He has certainly found a Snark!&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_178" id="Page_178">[Pg 178]</a></span><br />
They gazed in delight, while the Butcher exclaimed<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;He was always a desperate wag!&#8221;</span><br />
They beheld him&mdash;their Baker&mdash;their hero unnamed&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">On the top of a neighbouring crag,</span><br />
<br />
Erect and sublime, for one moment of time.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In the next, that wild figure they saw</span><br />
(As if stung by a spasm) plunge into a chasm,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">While they waited and listened in awe.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;It&#8217;s a Snark!&#8221; was the sound that first came to their ears,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And seemed almost too good to be true.</span><br />
Then followed a torrent of laughter and cheers:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Then the ominous words &#8220;It&#8217;s a Boo&mdash;&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Then, silence. Some fancied they heard in the air<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A weary and wandering sigh</span><br />
That sounded like &#8220;&mdash;jum!&#8221; but the others declare<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It was only a breeze that went by.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_179" id="Page_179">[Pg 179]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i191.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;THEN, SILENCE&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_180" id="Page_180">[Pg 180]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>They hunted till darkness came on, but they found<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Not a button, or feather, or mark,</span><br />
By which they could tell that they stood on the ground<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Where the Baker had met with the Snark.</span><br />
<br />
In the midst of the word he was trying to say,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">In the midst of his laughter and glee,</span><br />
He had softly and suddenly vanished away&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For the Snark <i>was</i> a Boojum, you see.</span></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_181" id="Page_181">[Pg 181]</a></span></p>
<h2>SIZE AND TEARS.</h2>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i193.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>When on the sandy shore I sit,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Beside the salt sea-wave,</span><br />
And fall into a weeping fit<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Because I dare not shave&mdash;</span><br />
A little whisper at my ear<br />
Enquires the reason of my fear.<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_182" id="Page_182">[Pg 182]</a></span><br />
I answer &#8220;If that ruffian Jones<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Should recognise me here,</span><br />
He&#8217;d bellow out my name in tones<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Offensive to the ear:</span><br />
He chaffs me so on being stout<br />
(A thing that always puts me out).&#8221;<br />
<br />
Ah me! I see him on the cliff!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Farewell, farewell to hope,</span><br />
If he should look this way, and if<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">He&#8217;s got his telescope!</span><br />
To whatsoever place I flee,<br />
My odious rival follows me!<br />
<br />
For every night, and everywhere,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I meet him out at dinner;</span><br />
And when I&#8217;ve found some charming fair,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And vowed to die or win her,</span><br />
The wretch (he&#8217;s thin and I am stout)<br />
Is sure to come and cut me out!</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_183" id="Page_183">[Pg 183]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i195.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;HE&#8217;S THIN AND I AM STOUT&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_184" id="Page_184">[Pg 184]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>The girls (just like them!) all agree<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To praise J. Jones, Esquire:</span><br />
I ask them what on earth they see<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">About him to admire?</span><br />
They cry &#8220;He is so sleek and slim,<br />
It&#8217;s quite a treat to look at him!&#8221;<br />
<br />
They vanish in tobacco smoke,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Those visionary maids&mdash;</span><br />
I feel a sharp and sudden poke<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Between the shoulder-blades&mdash;</span><br />
&#8220;Why, Brown, my boy! You&#8217;re growing stout!&#8221;<br />
(I told you he would find me out!)<br />
<br />
&#8220;My growth is not <i>your</i> business, Sir!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;No more it is, my boy!</span><br />
But if it&#8217;s <i>yours</i>, as I infer,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Why, Brown, I give you joy!</span><br />
A man, whose business prospers so,<br />
Is just the sort of man to know!<br />
<br />
&#8220;It&#8217;s hardly safe, though, talking here&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">I&#8217;d best get out of reach:</span><br />
For such a weight as yours, I fear,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Must shortly sink the beach!&#8221;&mdash;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_185" id="Page_185">[Pg 185]</a></span><br />
Insult me thus because I&#8217;m stout!<br />
I vow I&#8217;ll go and call him out!</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i197.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_186" id="Page_186">[Pg 186]</a></span></p>
<h2>ATALANTA IN CAMDEN-TOWN.</h2>


<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td><span style="margin-left: 5em;">Ay, &#8217;twas here, on this spot,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">In that summer of yore,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">Atalanta did not</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Vote my presence a bore,</span><br />
Nor reply to my tenderest talk &#8220;She had heard all that nonsense before.&#8221;<br />
<br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">She&#8217;d the brooch I had bought</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">And the necklace and sash on,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">And her heart, as I thought,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Was alive to my passion;</span><br />
And she&#8217;d done up her hair in the style that the Empress had brought into fashion.</td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_187" id="Page_187">[Pg 187]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i199.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td><span style="margin-left: 5em;">I had been to the play</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">With my pearl of a Peri&mdash;</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">But, for all I could say,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">She declared she was weary,</span><br />
That &#8220;the place was so crowded and hot, and she couldn&#8217;t abide that Dundreary.&#8221;<br />
<br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">Then I thought &#8220;&#8217;Tis for me</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">That she whines and she whimpers!&#8221;</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">And it soothed me to see</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Those sensational simpers,</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_188" id="Page_188">[Pg 188]</a></span>And I said &#8220;This is scrumptious!&#8221;&mdash;a phrase I had learned from the Devonshire shrimpers.<br />
<br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">And I vowed &#8220;&#8217;Twill be said</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">I&#8217;m a fortunate fellow,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">When the breakfast is spread,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">When the topers are mellow,</span><br />
When the foam of the bride-cake is white, and the fierce orange-blossoms are yellow!&#8221;<br />
<br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">O that languishing yawn!</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">O those eloquent eyes!</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">I was drunk with the dawn</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Of a splendid surmise&mdash;</span><br />
I was stung by a look, I was slain by a tear, by a tempest of sighs.<br />
<br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">And I whispered &#8220;&#8217;Tis time!</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Is not Love at its deepest?</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">Shall we squander Life&#8217;s prime,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">While thou waitest and weepest?</span><br />
Let us settle it, License or Banns?&mdash;though undoubtedly Banns are the cheapest.&#8221;<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_189" id="Page_189">[Pg 189]</a></span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">&#8220;Ah, my Hero,&#8221; said I,</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">&#8220;Let me be thy Leander!&#8221;</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">But I lost her reply&mdash;</span><br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Something ending with &#8220;gander&#8221;&mdash;</span><br />
For the omnibus rattled so loud that no mortal could quite understand her.</td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_190" id="Page_190">[Pg 190]</a></span></p>
<h2>THE LANG COORTIN&#8217;.</h2>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>The ladye she stood at her lattice high,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Wi&#8217; her doggie at her feet;</span><br />
Thorough the lattice she can spy<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The passers in the street.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;There&#8217;s one that standeth at the door,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And tirleth at the pin:</span><br />
Now speak and say, my popinjay,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">If I sall let him in.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Then up and spake the popinjay<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That flew abune her head:</span><br />
&#8220;Gae let him in that tirls the pin:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He cometh thee to wed.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
O when he cam&#8217; the parlour in,<br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_191" id="Page_191">[Pg 191]</a></span><span style="margin-left: 2em;">A woeful man was he!</span><br />
&#8220;And dinna ye ken your lover agen,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Sae well that loveth thee?&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i203.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>&#8220;And how wad I ken ye loved me, Sir,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That have been sae lang away?</span><br />
And how wad I ken ye loved me, Sir?<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Ye never telled me sae.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Said&mdash;&#8220;Ladye dear,&#8221; and the salt, salt tear<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Cam&#8217; rinnin&#8217; doon his cheek,</span><br />
&#8220;I have sent thee tokens of my love<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">This many and many a week.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_192" id="Page_192">[Pg 192]</a></span><br />
&#8220;O didna ye get the rings, Ladye,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The rings o&#8217; the gowd sae fine?</span><br />
I wot that I have sent to thee<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Four score, four score and nine.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;They cam&#8217; to me,&#8221; said that fair ladye.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Wow, they were flimsie things!&#8221;</span><br />
Said&mdash;&#8220;that chain o&#8217; gowd, my doggie to howd,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It is made o&#8217; thae self-same rings.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And didna ye get the locks, the locks,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The locks o&#8217; my ain black hair,</span><br />
Whilk I sent by post, whilk I sent by box,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Whilk I sent by the carrier?&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;They cam&#8217; to me,&#8221; said that fair ladye;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;And I prithee send nae mair!&#8221;</span><br />
Said&mdash;&#8220;that cushion sae red, for my doggie&#8217;s head,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It is stuffed wi&#8217; thae locks o&#8217; hair.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;And didna ye get the letter, Ladye,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Tied wi&#8217; a silken string,</span><br />
Whilk I sent to thee frae the far countrie,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A message of love to bring?&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_193" id="Page_193">[Pg 193]</a></span><br />
&#8220;It cam&#8217; to me frae the far countrie<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Wi&#8217; its silken string and a&#8217;;</span><br />
But it wasna prepaid,&#8221; said that high-born maid,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Sae I gar&#8217;d them tak&#8217; it awa&#8217;.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;O ever alack that ye sent it back,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It was written sae clerkly and well!</span><br />
Now the message it brought, and the boon that it sought,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I must even say it mysel&#8217;.&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Then up and spake the popinjay,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Sae wisely counselled he.</span><br />
&#8220;Now say it in the proper way:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Gae doon upon thy knee!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The lover he turned baith red and pale,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Went doon upon his knee:</span><br />
&#8220;O Ladye, hear the waesome tale<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That must be told to thee!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;For five lang years, and five lang years,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I coorted thee by looks;</span><br />
By nods and winks, by smiles and tears,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">As I had read in books.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_194" id="Page_194">[Pg 194]</a></span><br />
&#8220;For ten lang years, O weary hours!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I coorted thee by signs;</span><br />
By sending game, by sending flowers,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">By sending Valentines.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;For five lang years, and five lang years,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I have dwelt in the far countrie,</span><br />
Till that thy mind should be inclined<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Mair tenderly to me.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Now thirty years are gane and past,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I am come frae a foreign land:</span><br />
I am come to tell thee my love at last&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">O Ladye, gie me thy hand!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The ladye she turned not pale nor red,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">But she smiled a pitiful smile:</span><br />
&#8220;Sic&#8217; a coortin&#8217; as yours, my man,&#8221; she said<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">&#8220;Takes a lang and a weary while!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
And out and laughed the popinjay,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A laugh of bitter scorn:</span><br />
&#8220;A coortin&#8217; done in sic&#8217; a way,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It ought not to be borne!&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_195" id="Page_195">[Pg 195]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i207.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;AND OUT AND LAUGHED THE POPINJAY&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_196" id="Page_196">[Pg 196]</a></span></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Wi&#8217; that the doggie barked aloud,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And up and doon he ran,</span><br />
And tugged and strained his chain o&#8217; gowd,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">All for to bite the man.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;O hush thee, gentle popinjay!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">O hush thee, doggie dear!</span><br />
There is a word I fain wad say,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It needeth he should hear!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Aye louder screamed that ladye fair<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To drown her doggie&#8217;s bark:</span><br />
Ever the lover shouted mair<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To make that ladye hark:</span><br />
<br />
Shrill and more shrill the popinjay<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Upraised his angry squall:</span><br />
I trow the doggie&#8217;s voice that day<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Was louder than them all!</span><br />
<br />
The serving-men and serving-maids<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Sat by the kitchen fire:</span><br />
They heard sic&#8217; a din the parlour within<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">As made them much admire.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_197" id="Page_197">[Pg 197]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i209.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;O HUSH THEE, GENTLE POPINJAY!&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_198" id="Page_198">[Pg 198]</a></span></p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Out spake the boy in buttons<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">(I ween he wasna thin),</span><br />
&#8220;Now wha will tae the parlour gae,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And stay this deadlie din?&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
And they have taen a kerchief,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Casted their kevils in,</span><br />
For wha should tae the parlour gae,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And stay that deadlie din.</span><br />
<br />
When on that boy the kevil fell<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To stay the fearsome noise,</span><br />
&#8220;Gae in,&#8221; they cried, &#8220;whate&#8217;er betide,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Thou prince of button-boys!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Syne, he has taen a supple cane<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To swinge that dog sae fat:</span><br />
The doggie yowled, the doggie howled<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The louder aye for that.</span><br />
<br />
Syne, he has taen a mutton-bane&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">The doggie ceased his noise,</span><br />
And followed doon the kitchen stair<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">That prince of button-boys!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_199" id="Page_199">[Pg 199]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i211.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;THE DOGGIE CEASED HIS NOISE&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_200" id="Page_200">[Pg 200]</a></span></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Then sadly spake that ladye fair,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Wi&#8217; a frown upon her brow:</span><br />
&#8220;O dearer to me is my sma&#8217; doggie<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Than a dozen sic&#8217; as thou!</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;Nae use, nae use for sighs and tears:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Nae use at all to fret:</span><br />
Sin&#8217; ye&#8217;ve bided sae well for thirty years,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Ye may bide a wee langer yet!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
Sadly, sadly he crossed the floor<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And tirl&euml;d at the pin:</span><br />
Sadly went he through the door<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Where sadly he cam&#8217; in.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;O gin I had a popinjay<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To fly abune my head,</span><br />
To tell me what I ought to say,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">I had by this been wed.</span><br />
<br />
&#8220;O gin I find anither ladye,&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">He said wi&#8217; sighs and tears,</span><br />
&#8220;I wot my coortin&#8217; sall not be<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Anither thirty years:</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_201" id="Page_201">[Pg 201]</a></span><br />
&#8220;For gin I find a ladye gay,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Exactly to my taste,</span><br />
I&#8217;ll pop the question, aye or nay,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">In twenty years at maist.&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i213.jpg" alt="" /></div>


<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_202" id="Page_202">[Pg 202]</a></span></p>
<h2>FOUR RIDDLES.</h2>

<div class="note">
<p>[These consist of two Double Acrostics and two Charades.</p>

<p>No. I. was written at the request of some young friends, who had gone to a
ball at an Oxford Commemoration&mdash;and also as a specimen of what might be
done by making the Double Acrostic <i>a connected poem</i> instead of what it
has hitherto been, a string of disjointed stanzas, on every conceivable
subject, and about as interesting to read straight through as a page of a
Cyclop&aelig;dia. The first two stanzas describe the two main words, and each
subsequent stanza one of the cross &#8220;lights.&#8221;</p>

<p>No. II. was written after seeing Miss Ellen Terry perform in the play of
&#8220;Hamlet.&#8221; In this case the first stanza describes the two main words.</p>

<p>No. III. was written after seeing Miss Marion Terry perform in Mr.
Gilbert&#8217;s play of &#8220;Pygmalion and Galatea.&#8221; The three stanzas respectively
describe &#8220;My First,&#8221; &#8220;My Second,&#8221; and &#8220;My Whole.&#8221;]</p></div>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3>I.</h3>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>There was an ancient City, stricken down<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With a strange frenzy, and for many a day</span><br />
They paced from morn to eve the crowded town,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">And danced the night away.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_203" id="Page_203">[Pg 203]</a></span><br />
I asked the cause: the aged man grew sad:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They pointed to a building gray and tall,</span><br />
And hoarsely answered &#8220;Step inside, my lad,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">And then you&#8217;ll see it all.&#8221;</span></td></tr></table>
<hr style='width: 15%;' />
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Yet what are all such gaieties to me<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Whose thoughts are full of indices and surds?</span><br />
x<sup>2</sup> + 7x + 53<br />
<span style="margin-left: 4.5em;">= <span style="font-size: 0.8em;"><sup>11</sup></span>&frasl;<span style="font-size: 0.6em;">3</span>.</span><br />
<br />
But something whispered &#8220;It will soon be done:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Bands cannot always play, nor ladies smile:</span><br />
Endure with patience the distasteful fun<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">For just a little while!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
A change came o&#8217;er my Vision&mdash;it was night:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">We clove a pathway through a frantic throng:</span><br />
The steeds, wild-plunging, filled us with affright:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">The chariots whirled along.</span><br />
<br />
Within a marble hall a river ran&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A living tide, half muslin and half cloth:</span><br />
And here one mourned a broken wreath or fan,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Yet swallowed down her wrath;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_204" id="Page_204">[Pg 204]</a></span><br />
And here one offered to a thirsty fair<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">(His words half-drowned amid those thunders tuneful)</span><br />
Some frozen viand (there were many there),<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">A tooth-ache in each spoonful.</span><br />
<br />
There comes a happy pause, for human strength<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Will not endure to dance without cessation;</span><br />
And every one must reach the point at length<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Of absolute prostration.</span><br />
<br />
At such a moment ladies learn to give,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To partners who would urge them over-much,</span><br />
A flat and yet decided negative&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Photographers love such.</span><br />
<br />
There comes a welcome summons&mdash;hope revives,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And fading eyes grow bright, and pulses quicken:</span><br />
Incessant pop the corks, and busy knives<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Dispense the tongue and chicken.</span><br />
<br />
Flushed with new life, the crowd flows back again:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And all is tangled talk and mazy motion&mdash;</span><br />
Much like a waving field of golden grain,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Or a tempestuous ocean.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_205" id="Page_205">[Pg 205]</a></span><br />
And thus they give the time, that Nature meant<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For peaceful sleep and meditative snores,</span><br />
To ceaseless din and mindless merriment<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">And waste of shoes and floors.</span><br />
<br />
And One (we name him not) that flies the flowers,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That dreads the dances, and that shuns the salads,</span><br />
They doom to pass in solitude the hours,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">Writing acrostic-ballads.</span><br />
<br />
How late it grows! The hour is surely past<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That should have warned us with its double-knock?</span><br />
The twilight wanes, and morning comes at last&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">&#8220;Oh, Uncle, what&#8217;s o&#8217;clock?&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
The Uncle gravely nods, and wisely winks.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">It <i>may</i> mean much, but how is one to know?</span><br />
He opes his mouth&mdash;yet out of it, methinks,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 6em;">No words of wisdom flow.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_206" id="Page_206">[Pg 206]</a></span></p>
<h3>II.</h3>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Empress of Art, for thee I twine<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">This wreath with all too slender skill.</span><br />
Forgive my Muse each halting line,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And for the deed accept the will!</span></td></tr></table>
<hr style='width: 15%;' />
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>O day of tears! Whence comes this spectre grim,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Parting, like Death&#8217;s cold river, souls that love?</span><br />
Is not he bound to thee, as thou to him,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By vows, unwhispered here, yet heard above?</span><br />
<br />
And still it lives, that keen and heavenward flame,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Lives in his eye, and trembles in his tone:</span><br />
And these wild words of fury but proclaim<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">A heart that beats for thee, for thee alone!</span><br />
<br />
But all is lost: that mighty mind o&#8217;erthrown,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Like sweet bells jangled, piteous sight to see!</span><br />
&#8220;Doubt that the stars are fire,&#8221; so runs his moan,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Doubt Truth herself, but not my love for thee!&#8221;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_207" id="Page_207">[Pg 207]</a></span><br />
A sadder vision yet: thine aged sire<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Shaming his hoary locks with treacherous wile!</span><br />
And dost thou now doubt Truth to be a liar?<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And wilt thou die, that hast forgot to smile?</span><br />
<br />
Nay, get thee hence! Leave all thy winsome ways<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And the faint fragrance of thy scattered flowers:</span><br />
In holy silence wait the appointed days,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And weep away the leaden-footed hours.</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3>III.</h3>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>The air is bright with hues of light<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And rich with laughter and with singing:</span><br />
Young hearts beat high in ecstasy,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And banners wave, and bells are ringing:</span><br />
But silence falls with fading day,<br />
And there&#8217;s an end to mirth and play.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">Ah, well-a-day!</span><br />
<br />
Rest your old bones, ye wrinkled crones!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The kettle sings, the firelight dances.</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_208" id="Page_208">[Pg 208]</a></span>Deep be it quaffed, the magic draught<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That fills the soul with golden fancies!</span><br />
For Youth and Pleasance will not stay,<br />
And ye are withered, worn, and gray.<br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">Ah, well-a-day!</span><br />
<br />
O fair cold face! O form of grace,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For human passion madly yearning!</span><br />
O weary air of dumb despair,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">From marble won, to marble turning!</span><br />
&#8220;Leave us not thus!&#8221; we fondly pray.<br />
&#8220;We cannot let thee pass away!&#8221;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 5em;">Ah, well-a-day!</span></td></tr></table>


<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3>IV.</h3>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>My First is singular at best:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">More plural is my Second:</span><br />
My Third is far the pluralest&mdash;<br />
So plural-plural, I protest<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">It scarcely can be reckoned!</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_209" id="Page_209">[Pg 209]</a></span><br />
My First is followed by a bird:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">My Second by believers</span><br />
In magic art: my simple Third<br />
Follows, too often, hopes absurd<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">And plausible deceivers.</span><br />
<br />
My First to get at wisdom tries&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">A failure melancholy!</span><br />
My Second men revered as wise:<br />
My Third from heights of wisdom flies<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To depths of frantic folly.</span><br />
<br />
My First is ageing day by day:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">My Second&#8217;s age is ended:</span><br />
My Third enjoys an age, they say,<br />
That never seems to fade away,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Through centuries extended.</span><br />
<br />
My Whole? I need a poet&#8217;s pen<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">To paint her myriad phases:</span><br />
The monarch, and the slave, of men&mdash;<br />
A mountain-summit, and a den<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Of dark and deadly mazes&mdash;</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_210" id="Page_210">[Pg 210]</a></span><br />
A flashing light&mdash;a fleeting shade&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">Beginning, end, and middle</span><br />
Of all that human art hath made<br />
Or wit devised! Go, seek <i>her</i> aid,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 2em;">If you would read my riddle!</span></td></tr></table>



<p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p>
<hr style="width: 50%;" />
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_211" id="Page_211">[Pg 211]</a></span></p>
<h2>FAME&#8217;S PENNY-TRUMPET.</h2>

<p class="center">[Affectionately dedicated to all &#8220;original researchers&#8221; who pant for &#8220;endowment.&#8221;]</p>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Blow, blow your trumpets till they crack,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Ye little men of little souls!</span><br />
And bid them huddle at your back&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Gold-sucking leeches, shoals on shoals!</span><br />
<br />
Fill all the air with hungry wails&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">&#8220;Reward us, ere we think or write!</span><br />
Without your Gold mere Knowledge fails<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">To sate the swinish appetite!&#8221;</span><br />
<br />
And, where great Plato paced serene,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Or Newton paused with wistful eye,</span><br />
Rush to the chace with hoofs unclean<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And Babel-clamour of the sty!</span><br />
<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_212" id="Page_212">[Pg 212]</a></span><br />
Be yours the pay: be theirs the praise:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">We will not rob them of their due,</span><br />
Nor vex the ghosts of other days<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">By naming them along with you.</span><br />
<br />
They sought and found undying fame:<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">They toiled not for reward nor thanks:</span><br />
Their cheeks are hot with honest shame<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">For you, the modern mountebanks!</span><br />
<br />
Who preach of Justice&mdash;plead with tears<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">That Love and Mercy should abound&mdash;</span><br />
While marking with complacent ears<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The moaning of some tortured hound:</span><br />
<br />
Who prate of Wisdom&mdash;nay, forbear,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Lest Wisdom turn on you in wrath,</span><br />
Trampling, with heel that will not spare,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">The vermin that beset her path!</span><br />
<br />
Go, throng each other&#8217;s drawing-rooms,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Ye idols of a petty clique:</span><br />
Strut your brief hour in borrowed plumes,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And make your penny-trumpets squeak:</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_213" id="Page_213">[Pg 213]</a></span></p>
<div class="figcenter"><img src="https://brian.carnell.com/wiki/_media/etext:l:lewis-carroll-rhyme-and-reason-i225.jpg" alt="" /></div>
<p class="center"><small>&#8220;GO, THRONG EACH OTHER&#8217;S DRAWING-ROOMS&#8221;</small></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>

<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_214" id="Page_214">[Pg 214]</a></span></p>

<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="5" summary="table">
<tr><td>Deck your dull talk with pilfered shreds<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Of learning from a nobler time,</span><br />
And oil each other&#8217;s little heads<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">With mutual Flattery&#8217;s golden slime:</span><br />
<br />
And when the topmost height ye gain,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And stand in Glory&#8217;s ether clear,</span><br />
And grasp the prize of all your pain&mdash;<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">So many hundred pounds a year&mdash;</span><br />
<br />
Then let Fame&#8217;s banner be unfurled!<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">Sing P&aelig;ans for a victory won!</span><br />
Ye tapers, that would light the world,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And cast a shadow on the Sun&mdash;</span><br />
<br />
Who still shall pour His rays sublime,<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">One crystal flood, from East to West,</span><br />
When ye have burned your little time<br />
<span style="margin-left: 1em;">And feebly flickered into rest!</span></td></tr></table>

<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p class="center">THE END.</p>

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