The Onion: All Of Area Man’s Hard Work Finally Pays Off For Employer

Hilarious story from The Onion,

SAN DIEGO—Following seven straight years of long hours at the office and sacrificed weekends and holidays, all of account manager Sam Hemstead’s hard work and single-minded devotion to Pinnacle Automotive Insurance has finally paid off for CEO Charles Pardahee, Pardahee said Friday.

“There were definitely some nights I’d lie awake in bed and wonder, ‘Is Sam absolutely killing himself day in and day out for nothing?’” Pardahee told reporters while driving to his weekend home in a recently purchased 2012 BMW luxury sedan. “But Sam just put his head down and never looked back, and this year his blood, sweat, and tears have proven profitable to the tune of a 15 percent larger bonus for myself.”

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